NOM NOMS

We're moving...

2011-10-12T00:40:00.000-07:00

First things first...

Steven and I are moving back to Vancouver, Canada. This is not a decision we chose on a whim in the moment. This issue of where to live and in particular our expectations of how we wanted to live came to our attention on the day of the double earthquake we and everyone in Chch experienced last June.
On one hand we didnt want to run away so to speak when as able bodied persons without children or elderly living with us, helping to rebuild Christchurch felt like a given. For me in particular it has been my home for 22 years, even including the times I lived in Dunedin as a student, Christchurch was always where my heart was. My mother and family live here, my church is here, my mentors and close friends are here. Why on earth would I consent to leave?

A couple of reasons, two practical and one selfish.

The selfish reason, for me personally I am naturally adventurous and I love to travel. Canada is the second largest country in the world and is a part of a continent. I think of CA (geographically) as like a blown up version of NZ really. I want to have a crack at living there long term. I want to explore the place.

The practical reasons, are money and housing. Here in New Zealand, Steven's Canadian qualification as a specialised teaching assistant isnt recognised, therefore all he can he can do is the minimum as well as the pay. With the recent earthquakes and govt cuts to spending in schools, its likely that when push comes to shove he would probably be first in the firing line. In Canada he has strong networks and strong work and character references. Not to mention hes paid more in a dollar with a higher value than NZ. I suspect he also very much misses the personal satisfaction that came with his last job and previous church through mentoring young people.

Secondly, finding a job as an OT in NZ is awful. Out of the 2009 graduating group from the OT school in Otago, 2/3 had to move to Australia to find work, despite the fact that there is a huge need for OTs the govt just can't afford us. The govt here made cuts to ACC a while back and those who got made redundant were OTS and physios. So when a group graduates theyre not only competing with their fellow classmates for the few jobs but their also competing with very experienced OTs. Its an unfair advantage that causes the new grads to do a runner over the ditch after being turned down for a position for the 20th time. Quite frankly, Ive had enough disappointment in just completing this degree. We hope to have children in the future and though I know money doesn't buy happiness I dont want an unhappy husband who is working in a area that doesnt meet and accommodate his potential. I dont want to raise children while struggling to pay back my $20,000 debt while unable to find decent work. In Canada, occupational therapy is huge and definitely valued. The minimum pay alone made me gasp when I first saw it. In Canada we can get house and contents insurance. I have no idea what it takes to save for a house, but to save for a house in Christchurch where the majority are broken and cold and the minimally decent ones become so inflated in price you have to be a millionaire to buy. On our pitiful income? With children in the picture? I dont think so. Vancouver is incrediably expensive, but I don't ask for much, but I feel more confident over there than in Chch.

I don't feel that wanting to be in a wealthier country to NZ is selfish and materialistic. Im not expecting Canada to be some kind of free ride to get away from liquefaction and pooping in the backyard. I want to pay off my huge debt, I want to see my husband happy and fufiled in his work and our church and I want to raise our children myself instead of giving them to others while I work full time with a dinky income while they develop asthma and chest infections because we can't afford a healthy home.

This hurts more than I think anyone can understand at the moment. Its very bitter and sweet at the same time. I start sobbing at the top of a hat if I think about those I love who I will be leaving, but I am also excited and happy and hopeful in my heart for this next adventure that awaits us.

Lemon and Poppy Seed Cake

2011-09-12T21:03:00.000-07:00

Lemon and Poppy Seed Cake

nb: Recipe taken from New Zealand Womens Weekly

4 Tbsp poppy seeds
1/4 cup of milk
Juice of one lemon
200g of butter - softened
Rind of one lemon - finely grated
1 cup of caster sugar
3 Eggs
2 1/4 cups of flour
2 tsp baking powder
1/2 cup sour cream or milk

Preheat oven to 180 degrees celsius. Grease a 25 cm cake tin (or loaf tin). Soak poppyseeds in lemon juice and milk for 10 minutes.
Beat butter, lemon rind and sugar until pale and creamy. Add the eggs, mixing well after each one is added.
Sift flour and baking powder into a larger bowl. Add half the butter mixture, mix then add the other half. Add the poppy seeds with its milk and the sour cream/or additional milk.
Spoon cake mixture into prepared tin and cook for 45-50 minutes or until an inserted skewer comes out clean.

There are also lemon flavoured icings and syrups that can go with this cake, but given that I added double the required lemon juice and rind, I hardly thought it needed more lemon flavour, and it still tastes fantastic.
This is one of those recipes that reminds me of food served during tea parties in the Regency and Victorian period that make me reminisce of my 50/50 English and Scottish heritage. For something thats essentially cake, it tastes really refreshing as weird as that sounds, which I suppose comes from the lemons, and while eating a slice I hardly felt as if I was eating something with butter and sugar in it as it was so light and moist.
So my husband came home after a hard days work of overseeing spoilt and annoying prep boys to find the kitchen a mess, our bedroom and living room a mess, but oh hang on a minute! I made a cake to make up for it! I gave him a slice which I saw him sniff appreciatively and I never saw him chew it but I did see him licking his lips. I take that meaning it disappeared into his stomach and I have better wrap up the rest for other occasions (I always hope to share my baking with visitors, but they typically get rationed when we've run out of ice cream).

Its a cheap and easy recipe and of course another excuse to happily rummage through my mother's lemon tree.

Pickle Joy

2011-06-06T04:30:00.000-07:00

One of the most marvelous yet slightly silly way of feeling joy in my life frequently involves getting something right the first time. This concept feels rather foriegn to me in the long term (concerning my heart wrenching/cardiac arrest inducing bachelors degree). But nevertheless, I have been compensating this fact with what pretty much always gives me joy - cooking. And not just cooking, because that would be a waste of my wallet and another contribution to my expanding waistline.

No, cooking involving making something that a specific person or people would enjoy.

One of my goals since meeting and becomming engaged to my handsome Canadian is to learn more about food in general from his side of the world. New Zealand to its credit has a wonderful array of ethnic foods specific to our land and sea, as well as the traditional favorites handed down to us from our settler ancestors (whether they be Maori or European). But at the end of the day, we are still a tiny country, and upon reading a 'Lonely Planet: Canada' book I realised how impressive and gigantic their food heritage is. Compared to the US where people go to become "American's" in the "land of the free", I find Canada's history a lot more open, friendly, explorative and sensitive than compared the US (my experience with American and Canadian border securities prove this theory of mine..) In Canada, I noticed, ethnic differences (especially concerning food) are not given the cold shoulder but are highly celebrated. And being the second biggest country in the world, I grant theres a lot.

What I want to reflect on is the humble sweet pickle that until this morning I have underestimated my entire life.

I won't bother trying to figure out where the sweet pickle comes from or who makes them the best. But to my fellow New Zealanders, before you laugh at me for crowing over the delishness of something that resembles a lumpy green penis, think again!! Have you truly tried them? I suppose after my penis joke no one will now.

I did this for Steven and for my own curiosity.

Every day since Steven moved away from his family and country to be with me, I have made it a priority in my life to incorporate and meld with my own, his Canadian culture. That means I wear the maple leaf as proudly as the fern (except in rugby cos they suck), maple syrup AND ketchup are now twin staple condiments on the table. Secondly I now say specific words like Steven (mainly cos I lost a bet re pronunciation), like Tom-ay-toz instead Tom-ahh-Toes. Mar-Garrr-Rin instead of Mar-Gaar-Rene, Ketchup instead of tomato sauce (shock, horror!! as my Mum says). Our children will have encyclopedic knowledge of both Rugby Union and NHL and *gulp dare I say it - Canadian Football...

When I first went to Vancouver, Canada to see Steven after 6 months of long distance and for meeting his family for the first time, I noticed he had a weird penchant for eating sweet gherkins/pickles straight out of the jar with a fork in one hand and an endearing childish grin on his face. Obviously this strong smelling green thing gave him enjoyment and with my only knowledge of gherkins comming from those disgusting little sour floppy green things you get in your Big Mac, I wasn't going to touch his sweet pickles with a 10 ft pole.

I do of course LOVE the Anathoth Farmstyle Relish that is made here in NZ. I don't know why. Its crunchy, its sweet and sour all in one taste. Its delicious on toast, its delicious on veges esp the good ol baked potato. In the words of Road Dahl its scrumdidliumpcious!

So out of wanting to give Steven this lovely home made treat that reminded him of home I never once thought the flavours would pretty much be identical with only a different vegetable being used.

I planned for two whole days. I scoured recipes online as well as processing instructions for using glass jars and storage and such. I remembered the wonderful Christmas present my futher mother in law gave me - a mennonite cookbook. I found over 10 bread and butter pickle recipes. All pretty similar but with a few differing tweaks in ingredients and processing methods. For my first time making such a foriegn recipe - this indecisiveness in recipes freaked me out! I thought, wasn't there just a base recipe that Mennonite women just stuck to?! Out of desperation I went back to my comfort zone for a mental break - New Zealand cookbooks. No where in the hugely celebrated Edmonds Cookbook was there any mention of any kind of pickle recipes. Then I took a risk and pulled out my Mums copy of Dame Alison Holst '500 Recipes' cookbook. This glorious woman had an entire section of pickles, relishes and chutneys along with the usual jams/jellies. Hallelujah!! AND two pages devoted to incrediably clear instructions for idiots like myself on preserving and sterilising.

I found a bread and butter pickle reciple with excellent instructions but the ingredients seemed rather bland compared to its Canadian Mennonite counterparts. So, I merged the two recipes.

The torturous thing about making home made pickles is not the cooking process but the wait. Every recipe version demanded that I wait a minimum of a week for the flavours to develop. I thought to myself - 'Great, I have to wait seven days in which I torture myself on whether I did it right only to find that when Steven eats it he will pull an ugly face or worse get food poisoning...'

Well, today was the big reveal and I couldn't help it, I was excited. I was reasonably sure that I got the recipe right but I still had a tinge of worry that I think kept me prepared should the worst occured.

Firstly, the seal was perfect. How did I know this? After 1o years of confidently opening difficult jars on my own I finally had to hand it over to Steven, who tried and then regretfully handed it to Mum who opened it with a jar opener by which it made a clear 'pop!' noise a freshly sealed jar makes when opened. Secondly the smell was amazing. Vingary, sugary and mustardy. Sounds like a weird trio but it works it really does.Thirdly, was the look on Steven's face when he poked a fork in the jar and ate some. Delighted surprise is the best way of putting it :D That made me soooo happy. We both then promptly cut into fresh bread buns with ham and cheese and loaded it with my pickles.

Oh my goodness, the taste was brilliant.

My only regret was that every pickle recipe catered for multiple jars. I only wanted one jar, so having to figure out how to divide ingredients and interpret conversions made me very anxious.

On making this recipe I had no idea how many cucumbers I would need so I ended up buying three very fat, over ripe, seedy dark green and lumpy ones. And after I poured the vinegar syrup with the cucumbers in the jars I found I had quite a bit left over. So, I will make an educated quess while looking at my pyrex measuring jug and say that the amount I made overall equalled to two 900g Pams jam jars. (thats two and a half pints). My other regret is how few cucumbers I used. This is my fault as several of the recipes suggested I soak the cucumbers in plain salt and water for 24 hrs. I ommitted this stage out of pure impatience and learnt my lesson from it. At the time, I remember packing the cucumbers in the hot jar like sardines in a can. But while it was in the fridge I noticed worryingly how it was appearing to look like there was just liquid and only a few cucumbers floating around. What happened? The cucumbers shrunk I think. I don't know how to deal with this in the future so I suppose Ive got to hunt for answers.

Until then, below is the recipe for two jars:

3 medium garden cucumbers (cut them depending on your jar size. I sliced mine into thick rounds, others like to slice them lenghways or not at all :D
1 Pickling onion for each cucumber (or half a normal onion for each)
2 Tbsp of plain salt (not iodised or else it goes scummy apparently)
1 cup of plain white vinegar
1/2 cup water

1 cup of brown sugar
1 Tbsp of mustard seeds
1 tsp of celery salt (or seeds)
1 tsp of turmeric

- Slice the cucumbers and onions into a bowl and prinkle half the plain salt in and mix ( I put rubber gloves on for this). Cover and leave in refridgerator for 24 hours.

- After 24 hrs, rinse the veges well and set aside.

- In a medium (non reactive) saucepan on medium heat bring remaining ingredients to simmering point. Add veges. Keep watchful and remember to stir so it doesn't get congealed. If it does add a little water and keep stiring

- In a large saucepan place chosen jars and lids and fill with water til everything is submerged. Remove and bring to the boil. Once the water is boiling place jars back in and set timer to 5 mins. It needs to boil for the entire time. Watch this very carefully and don't burn yourself! (Cover your arms and wear two cooking mitts if you freak out over spitting boiling water like I do).

- On your work bench place a clean tea towel or cloth and on top of that paper towels.

- For the last two mins of boiling time, place in boiling water the tongs you will use to lift out jars.

- After 5 mins is over turn off the heat to both saucepans. Very carefully transfer the hot jars using the tongs to the prepared surface and let dry for a minute.

- If you don't have a jar funnel like me, what I found useful for reducing spills was getting a piece of baking paper and folding it in half and placing it in a circle in the rim of my jars.
With the baking paper in place, use a large slotted spoon and scoop the veges out and place in the jars. It they overflow, pack them in (I used a potato masher). Pour the remaining syrup in until it overflows a bit (hence the paper towels!).

- Put the lids on and screw on snug (but not tightly!) and wipe down and store in the fridge

- Remember not to open it for a week!

Hospitality and Narnia

2011-06-04T19:12:00.000-07:00

The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe is one of my most beloved books. I loved it as a child, and as a 22 year old my love for this story has only increased and I suspect it will increase more when I one day read it to my own children as my mother did to my brother and I.

About a month ago, I felt a drawing to read in my bible the story of Abraham giving hospitality to two angels and the preincarnate Christ, who appear as foriegn travellers to Abe (Genesis 18:1-15).
Hospitality is treated as big deal in the bible and is therefore a big deal to learn and act similarly to this standard as Christian's. Even in secular cultures, a lack of hospitality shows hostility. And a lack of appreciation or acknowledgement of given hospitality is incrediable rudeness and often seen as deserving of death (at least in the bible and other ancient stories).

As many Christians know, CS Lewis is a renowned author known for his essays defending and explaining christianity. Steven and I own a fair amount of these collections, but Lewis's writing style is so academic and British (I mean that in a nice way) that it often takes as much concentration reading and mentally sifting through his ideas as reading a statistics textbook. Although Id much more prefer the former. But, putting aside his brillaint essays, the Narnia stories are the most easiest to read and interpret because he aimed for the books to be written for children.

There have been so much written on biblical allegories of the Narnia stories that I darent try anything major here in my blog except to focus on one small portion of LWW (The Lion the witch and the wardrobe). The example being shown in the picture on the right of the dinner shared by Mr & Mrs Beaver and the four Pevensie children. I won't explain the plot here, because if you haven't read the story, shame on you! Go read it now!

Anyway..

I absolutely adore this picture, and whoever did the illustrations for the series did a wonderful job. True to the book it shows the wonderful simplicity of the hospitality given by the Beavers. There are quite a few examples of food used in LWW ie Lucy's meal with Tumnus, The reuniting meal of the four children after Edmund is saved, the post battle supper and of course the coronation feast at Cair Paravel. All stories illustration the fantastic use of food in bonding, fellowship and celebration.

Here's an excerpt about the Beaver's hospitality:

"'Here we are, Mrs Beaver,' said Mr Beaver, 'Ive found them. Here are the Sons and Daughters of Adam and Eve' - and they all went in.
The first thing Lucy noticed as she went in was a burring noise, and the the first thing she saw was a kind looking old she-beaver sitting in the corner with a thread in her mouth working busily at her sewing machine, and it was from it that the sound came. She stopped her work and got up as soon as the children came in.
'So you've come at last!', she said, holding out both her wrinkled old paws. 'At last! To think that I should ever live to see this day! The potatoes are boiling and the kettle's singing and I daresay, Mr Beaver, you'll get us some fish.'
'That I will ,' said Mr Beaver, and he went out of the house (Peter went with him)... Meanwhile the girls were helping Mrs Beaver to fill the kettle and lay the table and cut the bread and put the plates in the oven to heat and draw a huge jug of beer for Mr Beaver which stood in one corner of the house, and to put on the frying pan and get the dripping hot... There were no books or pictures, and instead of beds there were bunks, like on board a ship, built into the wall. And there were hams and strings of onions hanging from the roof, and against the walls were gumboots and oilskins and hatchets and pairs of shears and spades and trowels and things for carrying mortar in and fishhing rods and fishing nets and sacks. And the cloth on the table, though very clean, was very rough...
Susan drained the potatoes then put them all ack into the empty pot to dry on the side of the range while Lucy was helping Mrs Beaver dish up the trout, so that in a few minutes everyone was drawing up their stools (it was all three legged stools in the Beaver's house except for Mrs Beaver's own special rocking chair beside the fire) and preparing to enjoy themselves. There was a jug of creamy milk for the cildren (Mr Beaver stuck to beer) and a great big lump of deep yellow butter in the middle of the table from which everyone took as much as he wanted to go with his potatoes... When they had finished the fish, Mrs Beaver unexpectantly bought out of the oven a great and glorious sticky marmalade roll, steaming hot, and at the same time moved the kettle onto the fire, so that when they had finished the marmalade roll the tea was made and ready to be poured out. And when each person had got his (or her) cup of tea, each person shoved back his (or her) stool so as to lean back against the wall, and gave a long sigh of contentment.
'And now,' said Mr Beaver, pushing away his empty beer mug and pulling his cup of tea towards him, 'if you'll just wait til Ive got my pipe lit up and going nicely - why now we can get to business...'"

Theres some points I want to make about this passage re biblical hospitality (or lack thereof).

Although I didn't add the passage in from the previous chapter, by the opening statement of Mr Beaver, its clear that Mr Beaver had been looking for the children. Neither do we know when Mr Tumnus' arrest occured (which is the reason Mr Beaver is looking for them being a close friend of Tumnus). Mr Beaver would have gained all his knowledge of the children from the faun, and we can guess that he knew the children were foreigners and needed provision. The fact is, is that Mr Beaver persued the children with passionate concern of the level of a loving close relative or parent. Secondary to Mr Beaver's actions were the reinforcement from Mrs Beaver. In the movie version, the Beaver's relationship with one another show something like an old couple who are still young at heart to tease each other but wise enough to trust, cherish and help each other. Mrs Beaver epitomises the biblical allegory of God naming Eve as Adam's helper. She maintains the home while Mr Beaver searches for the children. That role I believe is not anti feminist nor chauvinistic. Instead the roles appear as very complimentary. The description of pairs of tools around the house and of Mr Beaver assisting with the dinner (catching trout) show that they work together as a team. So whats the lesson here?

Firstly, although I believe God places persons in our lives (sometimes right in front of us) so that we can help them, and other times we have to persue them. I don't think this is because we have a lack of trust/faith in God, but a way of following our faith in action. In the bible Abraham's example of faith was described by the apostles not as a thought but as an action of hearing the Call and persuing something he could not see but which was promised to him as a reward. The same is true for Mr Beaver.
Secondly, as I said before Mrs Beaver is illustrated as the biblical female helper. The first statement re Mrs Beaver shows her busy at work at a constructive activity (sewing). This is later to be explained as a cherished activity that is particularly hers by the fact that she later gets a brand new sewing machine from Father Christmas. When the children arrive they find she (in the practical sense) is ready to meet their physical needs and she immediately stops what she is doing and extends a lovely sincerely warm welcome to the children. It doesn't show her pacing up and down the house worrying (maybe perhaps in her head) nor rocking backward and forward in her rocking chair doing nothing. She is prepared. And in the story she strikes me as the kind of she beaver who regardless of Mr Beaver unsuccessfuly searching for the children for days, she would still make sure that there was at least simple food and hot water ready for tea at all times.

CS Lewis goes into great detail of explaining how humble and simple both the Beavers and their home are. It comes to mind a parable in the bible about stewardship - "Whoever can be trusted with a little can be trusted with much..." (Luke 16:10). The thing that grabs me as genuis is the fact that in the animal kingdom, the beavers are known to be practical, hardworking and domestic. They're not grand, lazy nor do they eat other animals that come near their territory. Despite the weirdness of animals/creatures wearing clothes, eating toast and discussing politics, to the reader the idea of the beavers doing the same thing seem rather normal and comforting given their inherent nature. Us humans need to be more like them. I hear a lot of people saying that when they win the lottery, THEN they will be able to be more charitable. Bollocks I say. Its starts with being content with what you have and sharing what you have. As a christian I believe that the more propensity we are to learning this the more then God then trusts us with more in order for us to give more.
In the entire passage it decribes in detail how each of the children (minus Edmund) help with preparing dinner. Technically speaking Peter didnt help either but went along willing to learn and be Mr Beaver's assistant. As hostess Mrs Beaver accepted help from the girls. I wonder what Edmund was doing during this time and what the beavers and his siblings thought of his rudeness. We will never know. My guess is that he sat at the table and mulled over his situation (bitterness/anger at siblings for being found out to be a liar and longing for things his siblings supposedly wouldnt have access to - turkish delight, hot chocolate and a crown). Edmund's actions (or lack of) is how NOT to be a good guest. In todays world, we are taught to think that entertaining is cool, fun and easy. Just so you know - its not. I have an entire family made up of Edmund's. Womens magazines advocate cooking entire 3 course meals from scratch in just one hour, with no mention of help. The magazines also go on using words like envy, impressing, flavour explosions, elaborate etc etc. In a New Zealand House and Garden magazine never have I seen a home photographed that was simple, rustic and old. I quite often long to see homes that just look like a typical flat that looks lived in and homy and not fake, just to give myself some hope and contentment. Christian/Beaver hospitality as compared to 21st century entertaining is quite radical. Eating at the table, with no outside distractions is cherished. Focus is on one another not a piece of media. The beavers and three of the children understand the concept servanthood yet are not treated as servants (as compared to Edmunds ideas). The children have their milk, Mrs Beaver her rocking chair and Mr Beaver his beer and pipe. Reaping the rewards of their hard work particularly for the Beavers is wonderfully shown. Some legalist christians might be freaked out by the drinking of alcohol and spoking of a pipe in front of children, but I go back to my typical argument: though I think smoking and excessive drinking is unhealthy, I believe that when demonstrated by mature sensible parents (as shown by the Beavers, responsible drinking is beneficial and neither is smoking tobacco a sin so long as you're not breaking the law. Bearing in mind the context when this story was written and the author. CS Lewis himself was a great pipe smoker during a period when boys were getting blown up by bombs, and was viewed as a rare luxury, so too did he spend an enjoyable Friday night with Tolkien discussing their books over a beer or two.
Lastly the Beavers prioritised and provided for the basic needs before the secondary need of learning. They allowed the children and themselves to unwind, relax, eat their fill and get to know one another before moving on to serious important matters with a caffenated drink so as to focus. Genius.

In a nutshell
Persue hospitality & persons
Be a team player
Don't stress - Accept help
Work with what you've got
Its not about impressing
Be a good guest, pay attention and give thanks
Be content and enjoy your rewards
Provide an atmosphere of relief and relaxation before anything else.

Lemons

2011-06-02T21:09:00.000-07:00

So, Steven and I are getting married in exactly a month.

I suppose I really had better start making wedding preparations... Jokes

Thing is everything is going swimmingly well, Ive had to do hardly nothing except pretty easy things like outfit, picking out cutlery, music and my bridal shower (mind you my maid of honour and mother are doing more than me in that respect).

One thing that has been on my mind more than the wedding would you believe is our flat (apartment to you North American folks). Aside from the sunshine daisy cotton candy joy of marrying the one I love the other thing Im looking forward the most is having our own home.

Seriously this is a big deal to me. Ive been wanting this since I was 13, maybe even younger.

Ive been to college, lived in a dorm and dealt with random guys streaking naked passed my room covered in coffee granules. Ive flatted with other christian girls and found them to be a right royal pain in the arse. Ive boarded with a woman and her 10 year old daughter discovered an unknown hatred for Miley Cyrus music and American teen sitcoms I never knew about. Ive lived with persons (older woman, two older guys) who introduced me to the brilliantness of Jon Stewart and turned out to be lot more interesting to live with than the missionary kids despite the general lack of bathroom cleanliness.

Wherever Ive lived, Ive tried extraordinarily hard to make the kitchen in use the kind of kitchen where wonderful things were created, things were organised exactly as I organised it and above all things the rules I made for the care of my knives and tupperware would be upheld. This had never happened. Aside from my hope in Jesus, my secondary hope is in a pantry cupboard where someone hasn't screwed with my labelling, jar turning and geographical brilliance.

So I am currently living with my Mum and using her kitchen in a way that sometimes annoys her (ie "MELODYYYYY!!! Where did you put the baking powder!!!" "In the place where its always been!! "I don't see it!!! Oh wait, there it is!!!! Why isnt the label facing the right way!!!!). I swear the jar turns itself, 'cos I know how annoying turned jars are..

ANYWAY..

So we as a country (New Zealand) have officially entered into winter (dun duh duh DUUUUH!!) and mum still has a huge glut of lemons growing on the tree in the backyard. Not content to watch them eventually fall, rot and decompose FOUR times longer than the average fruit n vege scrap, I collected an entire colander of lemons (theres still enough for 3 years worth of lemons to eat through on the tree though). I took these lemons, donned a pair of my mums surgical rubber gloves (she's a nurse) and grated and juiced the whole lot into a an ice cube tray and once frozen I put the little cubes into labeled ziplock bags to be kept for winter lemon cravings or as additional Vitamin C in my anti flu brew.

I believe this is pure thrifty genius.

I live in a city called Christchurch which is located on the Canterbury Plains in the South Island of New Zealand. A lot of words I know so heres a map to help the overseas folks reading this.

The awesome thing about Christchurch in the winter is that the area is known for hoar frosts in the winter. This begins at night with rain or storm type weather (sometimes even a smattering of snow) and by dawn the entire sky clears up and you wake to a blinding sunny morning with sunshine that literally hurts the eye balls (after a couple of grey wet days, no wonder). The scenery gives the opportunity for amazing photography. The down side is that the temperature seriously drops. Not earth shattering news for the boy who grew up in Manitoba and knows truly cold winters but for me its horrible. And for a lemon tree - its murderous torture. The hoar frosts causes practically every living plant to look as if its been coated in white sand paper. As a kid I used to often enjoy walking to school through the nearby park and hearing the blades of grass beneath my feet literally break like glass

I don't quite understand the ins and outs of caring for a lemon tree, but somehow without any work done on the tree at all every year our lemon tree/bush continues to give fruit.

When I find a decent price for a block of butter at the grocery store (for a huge dairy exporting country like us its nastily expensive to buy our own products), I will make a jar or two of lemon curd..

Heaven knows (and my mother) every autumn I will continue to take my pilgrimage to said lemon tree and take my tiny sneaky fill of lemons...

Wifedom

2011-05-28T05:22:00.000-07:00

Lately Ive been contemplating what it means to be a wife.

Aside from my usual cries to Dad about my career related 'when will I graduate' nightmares, my most frequent cry for help is this:

"God, I don't know how to be a wife!!"

And I often times feel pathetic for crying out like that when theres multiple bibles all over the house illustrating some brillaint examples of wives and some truly heinous examples as well as stories of women who do their best, still sin, screw up, anger themselves, their husbands and others, my faveorite of course being the history of Sarah. "The mother of our faith" as the apostle Peter says. REALLY?? You've got to be joking. What about Rahab or Ruth for crying out loud.. Those are exemplary women who showed obvious faith. Where in the bible does it say Sarah was faithful?

This is a woman, who laughed at God. In case you didnt know, thats not a good idea.

This is the woman who got so frustrated at Gods timing that she took matters into her own hands and gave her husband a mistress, and when that blew up in her face she then blamed him! Because of this one stupid act, familair by women since Eve we are still fighting a war in the Middle East.
This woman as a result of this mistake, instead of repented, coveted another woman and started abusing her instead.
When her husband tried to save his own skin and lied about her being his sister to the Pharaoh, no where does it say "Sarah replied, 'Abe you're acting like an idiot."

"For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to adorn themselves. They submitted themselves to their own husbands, like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her lord. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear. " - 1 Peter 3:5-6

No offence, Peter but why on earth did you use Sarah as an example for biblical submission? All her mistakes were due to fear.

Because of course part of being a christian wife is submission right?

Tonight was a fantastic example. After being tight with our money for a while and stressing out over our budget, I thought I had no right to ask to be taken out on a date (NOT one held at McDonalds), but I couldnt help but long for Steven to just get up and take me somewhere as a treat no matter how cheap. And while I was out in the garden weeding and getting my hands and knees filthy, he quietly plans to take me to a restaurant and movie.
I submit to that!

I think Peter used Sarah as an illustration as christian wife material not because she was the annoyingly perfect housewife from Proverbs 31 but because he was the noisy, argumentative, sarcastic, sinning and fearful wife of a faithful man was also was far from perfect. He chose her because she was imperfect.

That gives me hope.
Yes, Sarah started the Middle East conflict, but its not how you start but how you finish. When Sarah died, the bible says that Abe was distraught and mourned for months. And from Sarah came a lineage of unlikely culturally uncommon women like her -

A blackmailer/extortioner
A prostitute/traitor
A pagan widow from an incestuous family
An adulterer and co-conspirator of murder
A broke and illiterate teenage girl.

I love how God redeemed these women and gave them the honour of being the mother and great greatmother descendants of Jesus Christ.

The submission thing. Some women hate the very word. When I put submission + Jesus = I see love.
When I see Husband + Wife(submissive) = I am afraid. And I have every right to be.

So I make it my business to make this equation:

Steven (submitting to Jesus= sacrificing for Melody) + Melody (submitting to Steven) = That can definitely work.

Help me Dad. Help me to give up my pain and fear to you. Help me to give up my self righteousness, arrogance and firery tongue. Encourage and tell me how to comfort and rebuke while knowing the difference when to do the other. Please open my ears and eyes.
Amen

First Post for 2011

2011-05-17T14:13:00.000-07:00

Boy has it been a long time!!

Thats what happens when you start a blog for the sake of an assignment and forget to carry it on once the assignment is done.

So currently Ive no idea what to base this blog on except to sift through my own rambling thoughts on things I wish I could talk about more if it werent for the fact Id know peoples eyes (and heads) would roll.

I'll start with what Im reading.

With my fiance Im currently reading a book called Becoming a Prayer Warrior by Elizabeth Alves.
The thing is, my church here in Christchurch (Grace Vineyard) became geographically misplaced after the major earthquake that hit us last February and among many buildings that were severely and irrevocably damaged, so was our church building on Ferry Road. I suspect, the leaders and those who grew up in the building and had ties there feel the pain more than I do (as I only permanently joined the congregation in January). Anyway, Spreydon Baptist Church has graciously allowed us to use their church building til our leaders figure out our situation. So the big question is should we stay or should we leave Ferry Rd. They feel the prophetic need to teach us out of Nehemiah since the parallels are so uncanny as the theme of that book is physical, emotional, social and spiritual rebuilding. And one of the things theyve implemented is a time called Hope Rising, where the combined churches of Spreydon and Grace have been called to pray and fast for 3 weeks. The leaders feel that doing so is biblical and in my opinion smart after such an upheaval that an earthquake brings.

So the point is, that everyone is encouraged to give up something (typically a meal or multiple meals) and in that time pray for 3 weeks. The first week for ourselves and families, the second week for our church and the third week for the city and its leadership.

well the week before it started I prayed about it because I don't like going hungry and Id rather give up something else, but I felt God say to fast on Monday. Start my week focusing on God I suppose.
So last week I did just that and went hungry on Monday and spent the majority of the day either praying or reading my bible. It was incredibly uncomfortable (as I said I like the feel of having food in my stomach) and in all honesty I was wondering what sort of impact this was going to have on me as I wasnt really inviting the idea of doing this EVERY Monday. So anyway, I base my weeks praying on my needs and the needs of my fiance. And hardly surprising was our need for money. We had our WOF and Rego needing to be paid, while looking for a flat to rent once we're married, I had become officially unemployed and we still have wedding and honeymoon things to be paid for. So money is an issue right now. We're not painfully flat broke but we are at the level where we are praying over any and everything to do with money.

But wonderful things started happening. Our WOF check failed (as expected) but our bill wasnt as high as we thought it would be. We discovered money in our bank account that we did not budget for, so we were able to put a deposit on our honeymoon and we found a flat to rent within 3 days of looking AND Steven's boss asked me for my resume so he could see if he could find a position for me or at the least hand it on to others he know could help me.

So after the first week, was praying while hungry worth it? Heck yes.

So back to the book.
In the second week of praying (completed my 2nd fast yesterday a lot more cheerfully lol) and I thought to myself, what gives me the impression that my prayer life is great? Or even adequate? Admittedly these days I havent prayed with as much fervour as when I was a teenager when I prayed constantly and passionately. I realised, Ive actually have been very slack in this area of my walk and maybe its time for a bit of spiritual pruning, so I got a book from the church library to read and get some more ideas.

Onto the second chapter at the moment, and its a very good read and Steven and I had a fantastic discussion about it last night.

Before I go I'll share an interesting thing that happened this morning.

Two nights ago while I was reading my prayer book I was reading a bit on the difference between normal prayer and intercessory prayer. I dont think Ive fully figured it out but by my thinking intercessory prayer is when the Holy Spirit deliberately puts someone in your mind for you to pray for immediately. Theres been tons of freaky stories where people have interceded for someone at a weird time of the day/night to later find out that the person they were praying for was in a potentially or very harming situation, then to be saved by something or someone at that exact time. Other times it can be spiritual warfare intercessory prayer for someone. Sometimes God tells you whats happening to that person, other times he doesnt.
So anyway, I thought to myself, wouldnt that be an interesting experience.

To cut it short, I woke up this morning with the sensation of someone abruptly waking me up. I thought it was Mum cos she does it all the time but she wasnt there and the minute my mind focused on the fact that it was morning, into my head popped the face of a person I havent talked to since highschool. I wasnt even friends with this person we were just classmates who uttered a hello to each other a few times a year. It was totally weird, and I felt a huge sense of urgency to pray for them (though I had no idea what to pray). And I said out loud "God can't I just snuggle in my warm bed and casually hope the best for that person wherever they are?" The response I got - "No!"
So I literally stumbled out and onto my knees next to my bed to pray for this person and words started comming out that I didnt know I had. WEIRD. I hope it helped though.

My 2 new favorite songs

2009-12-05T03:15:00.000-08:00

Nicest wee note Ive ever recieved :D

2009-11-25T03:29:00.000-08:00

How do I like you. . .let me count the ways. . .

Your straight forward honesty,
Your witty sense of humour,
Your wonderful analogies hehe,
Your beautiful smile,
Your kind and caring spirit,
Your love for God,
You wonderful thick flowing hair,
Your sweet words and acts.

Only time will add more later ;) hehe

I love you - so I lift my voice

2009-10-18T04:28:00.000-07:00

My name Melody literally means 'beautiful sound/song'.
So how does a christian woman like myself who has limited vocal range think of this?
In the past Ive been really self conscious about it. I raised myself in an Anglican church where singing was done from hymn books and I spent a lot of the time lipping everything for fear of croaking and being heard.
Then I moved to Dunedin and joined an apostolic church where every one from very young children to sixty year olds sing and dance like theres some kind of heavenly mosh pit going on.

When I listen to my favorite secular music I try to sing it - I consider myself below average in talent.
But when Im in church, and Im filled with the Holy Spirit its like my opinion of my singing abilities are increased becasue I genuinely believe Im quite decent. And I think I am made decent because my singing is for me an act of love as well as one of obedience and submission.

My love for God through singing is truly a beautiful sound to him.

Of course it helps to know the music and words lol

Matthew 7: Part 2

2009-10-10T01:04:00.000-07:00

Right so Im going look at verse 6

V6
"Do not give dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do they will trample them under their feet - and then turn and tear you to pieces."

Dont have a clue what this means (must be my bedtime lol, my head aint working). As a humans we like to insult each other by calling each other dogs and pigs, but Im not sure if Jesus meant it as a human metaphor.. He wanted us to be loving no matter what right? Turn the other cheek ? Here is the same verse interpreted:

"Do not persist in offering what is important or sacred to those who have no appreciation for it, because your gift will not only be contaminated and be despised but your generous efforts could also be rebuffed and perhaps be openly attacked." - www.bible.ca

OMG! So he actually was referring to humans as pigs and dogs! Well I never..
I do get why he said that. Sometimes I meet people who are so snarky about my being a christian and they want me to talk about why Im a christian yet I know theyre only asking me so they can have an opportunity to criticise something about Christianity and I can tell that theyre even not remotely interested or open minded about it and I end up feel like theyre encouraging me to walk down a closed dark alleyway. I usually walk away from those situations not even bothering.

BUT in saying that, how am I to know I wont have an affect on them? People arent going to change their minds over God stuff because of one conversation. It would probably take many more conversations. And also, I think many Christians might actually abuse this scripture. Maybe Ive done it myself - but when have you ever come across someone and you didnt bother sharing the love of God just because of maybe their job, their current lifestyle, their being of a different religion maybe?

Its a hard thing and it reminds me of a memory I have of the church I went to before I joined Southlife (Dunedin). I was going to Dunedin City Baptist Church (DCBC) at the time, and one night after youth group, the leader asked us to go out and pray over the buildings at the university. I thought to myself - meh why not? One person in my group then went a bit further and actually went up to every muslim they saw and demanded to pray for them. Because Dunedin is renowned for its medical school it should then not be surprising that getting a doctorate here would be popular with overseas students - and trust me theres a LOT of them. Largely asian and indian, the majority of them being muslim. But when this person actually started harrassing them I actually wanted to go up to them and grab them by their shirt and tell them to shut up and leave the poor guy alone. Seeing this kind of thing occur puts me off and actually scares me of evangelising to be honest.

I've always felt that theres a time and a place for that kind of thing (not harrassment lol but non bible bashing). I know for a fact that if its late in the evening, during an exam time, and a woman wearing a headscarf comes towards you with a "omg Im so knackerd and starving" look on their face - this would be NOT be a great time to say "Jesus loves you!" And then they go "F off!" Thats just silly! And it makes us think "man, so unappreciative.. ahh well soldier on aye?"
Better to just bide your time. As Jesus said, some discernment is needed - "I send you out as sheep amoungst wolves, therefore be as shrewd as serpents and as innocent as doves." (Matt 10:16)

You know when you pray to God and you know your gonna get three answers - No, Yes or Not yet. In terms of evangelising has anyone actually considered the 'not yet' option? God has plans for everyone regardless of the fact that they're saved or not. Who are we to tell whether or not its their time and we're the ones deciding?

I feel like I want to say more but my head is a bit bleh right now... Must go to bed - Nite all

Matthew 7: Part 1

2009-10-04T00:29:00.000-07:00

I dont usually talk here about bible study that Im currently doing but my pastor has recently been doing a series of sermons based on Jesus' 'Sermon on the Mount', and this morning he talked so well I got really into it. The thing is, its so full of topics and questions that theres no way I could do a blog on the entire chapter in one night. So I thought I'd just look at chapter 7 bit by bit

Verse 1-5
This funnily enough is scripture I quote a lot to people who annoy me. I dont use the exact same language mindyou, but I say it in away that I know they'll understand. Its such a basic piece of advice thats so handy and affects so many people. V2 and V5 stick out for me and it simply talks of humilty, self evaluation, and that selfish need for humans to put each other down in order to feel important and righteous.

V2 "For others will treat you as you treat them, whatever measure you use in judging others, will be used to measure how you are judged."

Boy that scares me when I read that. I know that if time today was like that of before Jesus' time, I know I could be stoned multiple times over for that piece of sin. The good thing I feel about this is that with my study especially, it has forced me to change attitudes and beliefs that I held as a result of my painful upbringing. For a long while I felt I had a right to be able to stand in a crowded room, and judge the man who had hurt me for 10 years in my own personal way. Eye for an eye you know? But when I started my first year of occupational therapy in '07 the biggest thing I had to work on in my placements was acknowledging someones negative actions and attitudes and beliefs as irrelevant in building rapport with a client. For example, I once had a patient who had had a hip replacement at the young age of 36. Lovely guy, easy to talk to. But the nurses soon discovered that he was a marijuana dealer who enjoyed quite a bit of it himself. Me personally I think smoking or doing illegal drugs of any kind is stupidity in the highest form. Everyone who works in education or health knows that smoking the the leading preventable cause of death in the world. At the time, I was also having trouble after discovering my boyfriend at the time had not been honest to me about his own smoking. I absolutely hated it. But in considering this, this patient of mine really made me sit down and think for a bit. I thought, I dont know this mans life, I dont know how he got into it. And quite frankly its not my job as an occupational therapist to even inquire about his smoking (maybe his GP) and most importantly, it would be completely unprofessional of me to make his private use of his leisure time a factor in our therapy sessions. I had no right to judge him. Turns out the next day, once the nurses found out he was a drug dealer he got treated like shit. The nurses ranted about his "disgusting habit and occupation " in the staff room and I was aware that he was now being given third rate care by the orderlies in showering and toileting him. This actually upset me and because of their behaviour I actually built an even better working relationship with this guy than before.
I dont know what happened to that guy. But I know he left the ward knowing he could trust an 18year old female OT student to give him the care anyone else deserved. It doesnt mean I now think smoking is awesome. I still hate it. But Ive been teaching myself to hate the habit not the person. At the end of the day, even though Im not a medical student, I think of that oath they take which was first written by that ancient greek physician guy Hippocrates (I think it was him) - "Above all else do no harm."
Whether it be a straight laced honest working lawyer or a serial rapist who was sadistically abused as a kid, it is my duty to care not judge.
I do believe in the system of juries and courts but at the end of the day the only person who has the right to judge is God.
I forget this so often.

V5 "You hypocrite! First get rid of the log from your own eye; then perhaps you will see good enough to deal with the speck in your neighbors eye."

I hear God saying this to me so often. Mindyou, usually he says in in a more gentle manner as if hes nudging me in the back saying "Oi, Melody thats not on.." And I've learnt that if I ignore that first loving piece of constructive criticism by God, it will eventually turn into painful but humbling discipline that I know I deserved.
As Paster Paul at my church was saying, in order for this to be effectively occuring, we need to be consistently self evaluating ourselves. And honestly too. Cos if we give ourselves a sappy evaluation it just shows that we dont want to acknowledge that our attitude is wrong and that we're too lazy to fix it. OTs, psychologists and counsellors all know that the first step to positive change in behaviour is self acknowledgement of of how we stuffed up and asking for help. And this piece of group therapy logic comes straight from the awesomest counsellor ever - Jesus, in Matt 5:3-12. "Blessed are the meek, blessed are those who mourn, blessed are those who are poor in spirit.." WHY are they blessed? Cos they know it and their being honest that they're hurting! And they want it to change by asking God for help. And that process of honesty is the pulling the log out of their eye. Therefore they are now blessed cos their eye doesnt hurt from all the wood particles. lol

New Post in a while..

2009-10-02T01:07:00.000-07:00

I thought I'd better start putting some stuff in here after a long break - Or maybe Im just procrastinating...

Theres two things that have been on my mind of late. One of them is singlehood and the other is loving unlovable people.
I'll talk about the latter first.

One thing that I've felt I've got an assignment from God recently is trying to love people I dont want to love. It started off with going to a life group at the start of the year. For quite some time Ive been really anti about hanging out with my own sex (how can anyone be sexist about their own sex?). Im still trying to figure out why I prefer having male friends to female ones, but now, Im finally comming to terms with my need for female company. Its been hard.. oh so hard.. And I found life group a place where I had to reteach myself no to be so bitter and judgemental. It was the worse kind too, you know the kind where you think you're absolutely right and everyone else is wrong... Not a good place to be. Sometimes, I get selfish and believe that I have a right to be angry about the past and the way I was treated and how no one supported me through it. Then I get what I call a 'God nudge' where he just pokes me in the back and goes: No no Melody thats not true..
But anyway Im going off track. Loving unlovable people. In particular Im thinking of this girl at work. She really does drive me nuts. Funnily enough, I actually went to Intermediate School with her back in Christchurch. I hardly knew her back then cos we were in different classes but I knew enough to know that no one liked her and no one hung out with her. Now Im working with her, and its the same thing all over again except Im comming to understand and share the general feelings of discord as well. Ive been given a big telling off about this from upstairs so Ive started to try and understand why shes the way she is. And what Im doing thats potentially setting her off.
First and foremost, I am not one who gossips at work (cos most people at my work are highschoolers and what they argue about is not worth my time to worry over). But what Ive been doing so far is changing my tone of voice when I talk to her. A lot of the time I find myself exaserbated by the way she speaks to customers. She is not afraid to swear at people in drive through and I think she has appalling manner to those who are disabled. I also find it hard to get along with people who generally dont care and dont make extra effort to making people feel welcome etc. And her work ethic really gets me there. The final straw I had with her the other day was she came into the staff room having barely put out her cigarette and then commenced blowing the rest of the smoke on to my face. Usually I would think of this habit with pure disgust but the fact that I had been having breathing difficulty due to my asthma that I get every time I have a cold, and that I knew, no amount of medical explanation would convice her not do it or even to apologise. And if you know me, then you know that smoking absolutely drives me up the wall.
However.
I dont know her life. I dont know why she smokes. I dont know why she seems to enjoy being indifferent and sullen towards me, I suppose I encourage it in a way. But heres what Im trying to do. I find people like you a lot more if you just use manners. And saying please and thankyou to someone who I know whill never return the favour is hard to stomach but I've been doing it lately, and surprise surprise shes stopped being so annoying. Another thing Ive started doing is just praying for both of us to understand each others way or working. As much as I'd love to be accomodating towards people who annoy me, I dont want to give them the wrong impression that I'll let them walk over me. So I asked God to just help her to see it my way as well. I hope thats not selfish. It will be interesting to see how this goes over time.

Right second topic was singlehood.
Even though Im interested in someone (and vice versa), I think its still appropriate to say Im single. Mindyou if things go well, then I suppose, I'll change that status in a couple of months time. Ive talked to my mum about this, and Im wondering if people will find it insulting that so soon after my breakup that I met and liked someone new. Will they think its a rebound thing? Or will people just think, oh cool good for her then.
I constantly review in my head how the past few months have been for me. When I told my friends I had broken up with my boyfriend I was called an ungrateful idiot by quite a few. But personally, I know I've done the right thing. It was like a major revelation for me. There was love, no doubt about that. Lots and lots of it. But none of it ever got upstairs to the one who deserved it the most. And I think it got to a point where I was trying to fill that void with things that would have been a disaster had they happen.
Letting go was incrediably hard and was the ultimate show of obedience to God on my part. And in a way, I feel a bit like Job who after losing absolutely everything (including his family and health) he still praised God. And for that he was rewarded quadrupled for his faithfulness and obedience.
After admitting and being sorry to a whole list of things I feel all clean. I feel like a bride - whose so incrediably happy with her husband. And ever since Ive entered into this somewhat unfamiliar business called celibacy with boundaries. Its been interesting. Of course its not totally been tested yet. When that oocurs I hope by then Ive changed a few old attitudes of mine.
Now Im even more piqued. Before, I was of the opinion that there was no man on earth better than the one I just left. And as much as he was a lovely fantastic guy (I still think hes awesomely cool) - boy did I put him on a pedestal. An unhealthy one at that. And now, Im wondering, like Job, for being obedient - am I being rewarded with another? Someone who is so way better, it didnt even occur to me that people like that existed? Heres me thinking, after everything I've gone through, who would want me? I couldnt believe it.. Heres someone who just happens to agree with me on practically everything. Is into the same things as me. Is a lot older and gone through more than I but still manages to ask me for advice? Is foreign enough to be deeply facinating yet not to give me headaches over cultural differences (at least not that I know yet anyway lol). Its insane how much I like this person. To the point where its worrying. Ive told myself not to get excited yet I am. Im still waiting for those flaws to come out. No one is THAT perfect. I think before December rolls around I will have lost my mind.
In the meantime though, I'll just do my best to enjoy the time Ive got here to myself and work on me :D

Home at last (for a while anyway)

2009-06-21T16:19:00.000-07:00

Its been a while since I last wrote,

In all honesty I was seriously getting weary of Dunedin and those in it. I finished my paper which I cant bring myself to predict what grade I'll get as the last time I did that I got the opposite mark of what I thought so Im keeping my thoughts to myself. All I say is - I hope I passed. If I fail Im definitely out, and I'll have no idea what I'll do but I'll have to see what my grade is first.

Work has been bit of a nightmare. I work in the only McDonalds outside of the student campus, therefore itis the McDonalds all the parents and kiddies go to. So instead of having abusive drunks to serve, I have paranoid, manipulative middle class mums who insist on bring their child with a thousand allergy requirements and then demanding why do we not have gluten free bread buns etc etc. I want to shout at these immensely stupid people "why the hell do you come here?!, This is McDonalds for crying out loud!!" We do not have the same standards as a 5 star french restaurant and I think people forget this. In fact,I've always wondered why the tv show target never does a bacteria test of something on the place, and hasent anyone seen "Supersize me"?

On the other side, on most nights I genuinely enjoy the work. It keeps me busy and its not repetitive. I have two supervisors I like a lot and a lot of other supervisor who (to put nicely) make comments crop to my mind that I try to keep to myself.

Another thing I've noticed which is the same in any minimum wage job is that the people who have been there the longest are institutionalised with the work. Ive seen this in supermarkets and other places as well. There are some people at work who I get the feeling are heading towards an early heart attack. I mean - its a normal thing to yell like gordan ramsay people who arent fast enough or doing the wrong thing at the wrong time, but I get yelled at because I happen to be scooping chips in the WRONG HAND therefore Im doing it completely wrong which deserves to be yelled at next to my ear. In my head I am saying to them "Get a fucking life will you?!!" I am good at my job and proud of it, so when I get yelled at by someone to get ice and I say back "I've already done it!" They pause for a moment to say "well you havent stocked up on burger containers!" and I shout back "thats not my job, thats prep", they say back, "I dont give shit, just go get them"
A couple of days pass by and when its quiet and ive done all my jobs like stocking up, I notice prep is down on some containers so I got off to get some for them. A manager sees me and says "what the hell are you doing?" when i tell them, they say "thats not your job - go do your own!"
WELL HELLO?!! Go tell that to the other stupid manager the other day whose addicted to yelling at me! you see where Im comming from?
The other day I nearly broke down - either to punch someone or just cry. It was horendously busy as most Saturaday nights go so you needs to have your wits about you. Im getting yelled more than usual tonight again for the stupidest things that are out of my control, like drive through stealing my burgers when my customer has waited for 15 minutes. I contront them and say, no offense but my customer has been waiting bloody ages for that and you just took it - they say "thats your fault". Im sorry, ITS MY FAULT?!! The customer heard what the drive through person says and yells at me then demands free stuff and then says to me, I'm going to my table and you can bring me my order. I tell her "Im sorry ma'am, but I cant do that as theres other people to serve and its too busy." She then says "you guys are the most fucking worst place ever" - AND she SPITS on me. I nearly lose control this point as I am highly embarressed and trying so hard not to publically cry while at the same time I want to return the favour and spit back at her. I tell themanager in charge that I got spit on and that Im clearly upset and they say "I dont care get on with your work." I nearly walk out. I go back to serve and the next customer whispers to me "that lady was horrible, your doing great dear, hold on there we know your doing your best." I swear, that random lady who said that to me deserves a noble peace prize for thwarting my plans for world war 3 and bring my heart rate down. God bless her.

Books

2009-05-28T20:32:00.000-07:00

Im currently reading a fantastic book called "Better Off" by Eric Brende. Its about an American bloke who after doing the usual tertiary study on the effects of electricity on humans (or technology in general), decides to embark on a wee experimental adventure (without funding) on living without electricity for 18 months.

So after randomly meeting an Amish bloke at a intercity bus depot and enquiring how might a non Amish person do the non technology sort of thing, Brende and his new wife moved to live in a community dubbed by Brende as the Minimites. A small community made up of people mainly from other Amish communities but also astonishingly enough, a few past city slickers so sick of the side effects of pollution, television and mcdonalds that they've full heartedly entered themselves into this lifestyle. The author pretty much created the word Minimites with the words Mennomites (what some Amish call themselves) and Minimalists = people who believe communal hardwork and fellowship is in fact a cool thing (I tend to agree).

One point to make is that Brende is not saying technology is awful, only his message is about doses and levels of technology in moderacy. His experiences and thoughtful insight will make you question whether or not that brand new state of the art washing machine you just bought really is time saving or is it just another machine that your family culture circulates around with a manual that gives you double the stress compared to the more"old fashioned" simple machines.

Reading this book was inspirational and made me want to go outside in the dreary Dunedin cold to create a mini farm in my backyard it also made me want to chuck my television out the window but after a while I thought - better just turn it off at the wall.

Crazy Dreams

2009-05-27T20:51:00.000-07:00

Theres something thats been on my mind for quite a while and only recently, have I actively decided I wanted to do this:
Write a book.

My logical self screams "Why should I even bother??!!"
My gut tells me its a fantastic idea.

I want to write a book that is part memoir part self help. As a Christian and a survivor of domestic abuse, I feel like I've got a story to tell and an urge to assist those out there who are trapped in abusive relationships and/or marriages. It has also come to my attention how much of a controversial topic this is in the church.
The man who abused my family and myself claimed to be a "God fearing man." He didnt go to church but boy did he use christian doctrine to condone what he did. And everyone outside of my family fell for it especially my own church family. When I bravely asked for my pastor for a place to stay he said no and said he didnt want to cause trouble with the man in question by "butting in on family matters." To this day I am appalled at the lack of support for my family which was all fuelled by fear.
I have a strong feeling that there are others out there who are experiencing this. I also want to aim this book at those who have commited their lives to Christ, but find that they are being persecuted by their spouses for their new choices. I want this book to help people identify abuse especially emotional abuse tactics that most of the time only victims recognise. I want in the book to have resources available to people who want help but dont know hwere to go.

And lastly, I am sick to death of the stigma that is attached to divorced women who want to go to church. People need to wake up to this and bring this discussion upfront. Im am sick of the ignorant and stupid ideas by people who have no experience whatsoever in the matter of abuse who say

"why dont they get out?", "why would any self respecting woman stay with a man like that?" "abuse only happens in poor neighborhoods.." blah blah blah.

Right now, my heart absolutely cries out for that lone beaten woman and for all those children in the past have been abused by family members but where the doctors were too late to save them.

And most of all, my heart cries out to all communities and its members who think "Its not my problem" or "I dont want to cause trouble" or "even though her husband beat her up for over 10 years shes commiting a big sin by divorcing him..."

I feel like this angry passion for this topic is boiling up within myself and I want to explode.

In order for this book to be a decent piece of work, I predict it will take me years to do this. Plus it wouldnt be too bad to have a few years as an occupational therapist under my belt. See the real effects of abuse first hand etc. But, by that stage my memory will be a bit fuzzy, so Im writing my memories of those painful events even now as I write this. I'll do some research in my next holidays though as Im currently quite busy with study.

Is this a crazy dream? Has anyone ever bought up this topic before? (abuse, divorce & church)

Music

2009-05-25T23:46:00.000-07:00

Lately, Ive been noticing a change in my habit of listening to music/radio in my bedroom or car.

In the past, Ive set my stereo as an alarm clock so that it automatically turns on at 7am every weekday. It has been playing the same radio station since my first year in highschool (Im now 20 years old). My reasons for keeping it on this particular radio (which shall remain nameless) have been because its Breakfast Show gives me a few good ol laughs and also the fact that I've won 500 dollars off this show and other prizes are why I've kept reasonably loyal to it.

However, since the start of the year and probably due to my lack of having to wake up early for 8am lectures anymore, I've had it off quite a lot of time off. When I do wakeup, Im often too busy (dealing with the freezing Dunedin cold) to listen to it or I wake up after the breakfast show is finished.
Ive also come to the realisation that I really despise music from this decade. Not all of it - but most of it. Ive been spending more and more of my huge free time reading my bible and learning lots. Its a bit lonely sometimes as I live on the other side of town from campus but I have been thoroughly enjoying the benefits. I havent particularly prayed for this out loud or anything but to me it seems as if God has extended my gift of discernment over to music as well. So when Im driving to and from campus I like to have a bit of background noise in my car (as you do sometimes). My car radio is permanently tuned to a station that plays popular pop music with themes like dress up like a chicken to win freebies. One of the things I like about this radio station is that it randomly plays songs from the 80's and 90's. And when a song comes on with lurid lyrics or themes etc its like I get an instant migraine. For example "The Fear" by Lily Allen. I dont know her, I dont know her personality, but seriously where in that brain of hers does she come up with lyrics like that?!

"I want to be rich and I want lots of money. I dont care about clever I dont care about funny. I want loads of clothes and f***loads of diamonds. I heard people die while they are trying to find them. I`ll take my clothes off and it will be shameless. Cos everyone knows thats how you get famous. I`ll look at the sun and I`ll look in the mirror. Im on the right track yeah Im on to a winner.
I dont know whats right and whats real anymore. I dont know how Im meant to feel anymore. When we think it will all become clear, Cos Im being taken over by The Fear. Lifes about film stars and less about mothers. Its all about fast cars and cussing each other. But it doesnt matter cause Im packing plastic, and thats what makes my life so f***ing fantastic..."

You know, lots of people I'm sure will say its all innocent lalala. But I'll tell you what, young kids who dont understand the message of this song will still memorise the lyrics which will be soaked in like a sponge, til it can be used later on (I would know, I can still remember those embarressing Spice Girl lyrics from my girlhood).

The fact is, is that I still turn the radio on in the hopes that they might play a U2 classic or a nice song by the Fugees or something.
I said out loud in the car the other day "The next time I hear that/those stupid song/s Im gonna turn it off for about 3 mins and pray about stuff that Im grateful for."

Tell you what, my little trick is working. Its also helping my to tone my language down, though Im not perfect in that little area.

Adieu

PS
Whatever happened to REAL Rhythm and Blues aye? Not this downgrading too fast trash their playing these days. Man... I sound like my grandfather lol.

I miss OT *sigh

2009-05-03T18:34:00.001-07:00

The sad thing about doing only two papers this year is that I feel Im getting rusty with my passion for Occupational therapy. To think I fought the biggest fight of my life (so far) which had physical, emotional and spiritual repercussions in order to even get provisional entry in the degree course down here in Otago Polytechnic then to be accepted was the greatest accomplishment Ive ever done after the hellhole of 2006. Like the Shawshank Redemption - I had to go through a dark and terrifying tunnel of shit before I could come out clean.
First year in Dunedin was wonderful - no wait, it was the most beautiful liberation ever. Although I moved away from my mother and boyfriend, I had to do it for my own growth. The papers were interesting. Some extraodinarily difficult ie kinesiology paper and a few others but most were facinating and I got good marks.

Second year was another growth period. I started flatting for the first time. Good and bad times came out of that. But it was fast paced at polytech. The third years and lecturers warned us that it was going to be our toughest year. two one month placements in the middle of each semester as well as the workload that comes with doing 7 papers no one person could not handle without at least one emotional breakdown. Quite obviously this happened to me, while becoming a social recluse and doing too many frequent allnighters which resulted in me developing insomnia at night and hysteria during the day. Not a pretty sight...
So many people dropped out that year.

Amazingly I passed all of my papers save for one which I did so bad, the marker told me it was the worst mark she'd ever given in that one paper. Pretty shameful I know, though at the time I was more concerned about my emotional state and I allowed that remark to go over me like water off a ducks back - which incidently was thrown back at me at new years.
The second semester of last year was a mixed bonfire of warmth and hell as well. I was redoing a 1st year reflections paper that I failed only by 2% then later misread the reassessment requirements (the word "doh!" is appropriate here). So all in all I was working full time at a neuro rehab clinic in auckland while doing 8 full time papers. But I organised my time much better this time and by the time I got back to dunedin my refection paper was half way done and I was much more prepared for my practical exams.

Weird thing is is that my grades did not correlate with the work I put in. My 1st paper (or so I thought) was bloody good. After all I'd read the reading material and two qualified OTs helped me with ideas and such. I handed that paper in actually believing it was A- material.
By the time was over and the summer holidays began I started to worry about that paper. I got my marks back from all but that one paper and passed. Weird thing is is that I got all A's for the papers I did only an average amount of study to and got C- for the papers I put my blood sweat and tears into. Weird..

On the day of my birthday dinner with my boyfriend, after recieving no news whatsoever about the paper I had redone, I recieved a very abrupt letter from one of my lecterers stating my expulsion from the degree course because of my second failure in that paper. Later on that evening, my boyfriend was cheated over 500 dollars for a bottle of wine he did not intend to buy and out of grief over the letter and our hard earnt holiday money being forcefully spent on a 12 year old bottle of red - I drank only half a glass of the stuff and later on had a five day hangover as well as food poisoning. My mum rechons that my stress reaction to the letter then drinking a glass of good quality blackmailed wine would definitely have propelled anyone the urge to cry and vomit continuously for five days.

A week after that, I became angry. VERY angry. Being a christian I believed with all my heart from the age of 14 that God had chosen my career as an occupational therapist. I wasnt as intellectually brilliant at OT compared my teachers at highschool choice for me of doing a Masters degree in History (which I still happily study as a hobby), but I was passionate about OT. I love how I've grown professionally over the past two years - I love studying the theory and then going out into practice with real clients and actually seeing the results of my study in others. I have loved the feeling of servitude and going home after work and feeling happy and content and feeling as if I was a part of making the world a better place. Not to mention the more I learnt about the profession of OT the more glad I was that I chose to do it instead of doing History. As my mum told me this year - In this day and age of recession, there is always a need for OTs to be employed and I would never have any trouble finding a job compared to having a Phd in History and not knowing what to do with it after graduation.

I fought tooth and nail to be let back in and after finding out I'd only be allowed to do the two papers I previously failed this year I drove all the way to Moeraki Boulders to cry my eyes out (I was still just a tad angry).

Well now its May '09. And truth be told Im glad to have had the chance to have a break. Im sleeping like Ive never slept before, I have the energy to actually exercise and am actually earning money for my last placements next year so I dont have to add more to my debt. Im socialising more and enjoying church and spiritual growth much more than I ever hoped. And now that the second half of the semester is up and running again, Im looking forward to learning OT again. I miss the bulk learning, but Im also certainly enjoying my flexible timetable and am relishing in it. By February next year I will be refreshed and ready to finish my last year of study. Goodness knows how much Ive put into it.

I love OT !!

2009-04-26T16:38:00.000-07:00

I havent been in for a while quite frankly - been having a good time on holiday with my family and boyfriend in Christchurch. Man I miss them already.

This month is going to be a busy one for me and Ive made a few "resolution" type goals.
The week before I went away I bumped into an old acqaintance at the mall and the first thing she said was "cripes Melody you've put on weight!!" How embarressing was the fact that she was right? Didnt stop me from being annoyed though - she couldve been a bit nicer about it. So Ive decided to not lose weight but get fit somehow. I rechon going to the gym just to lose weight doesnt work because a. we've all tried doing it and then b. when we reach our goal we stop and later we we put on the weight again we wonder what went wrong. I always think back to my last year at highschool where I went cycling for 2 hours four days a week. Why did I do that - well quite simply it was part of an assignment I had to do for PE. A bit like a training program which I had to write a big paper on at the end about the process and results.

I need to do something like that again. Bit harder outside of highschool though. I cant really be bothered in doing a paper in personal training. Ive got a secret though - Id really love to get into dancing. Dunno what kind. Only problem is money, time and lack of a partner. Mind you after writing that sentence I feel like saying screw those excuses. I'll look around.

The second goal is to give tithing a go. I know I should do it every week but come Sunday I usually dont have a lot of money anyway and/or I never actually carry cash on me. So Ive decided for two months Im going to give exactly 10% of everything I earn to church. I dont doubt that this is going to be hard. but I enjoy poverty most days and Ive just been on a bit of a spending spree while on holiday so I probably could do with some discipline. Im also doing it because I want to see and hear Gods response to what Im doing - souns a bit selfish I know but I just want to try it out. And Ive promised myself to take 10% out every payday and keep it safe til Sunday. Be interesting to see what blessings I may get in return.

My third goal is a bigger dillema to me than losing weight or tithing, and it sounds so stupid. Next year is my third and final year doing OT before I graduate and go out as a therapist. Only thing is - in order to register as an OT you need to have completed a portfolio. And mine is a mess. Ive got an entire year to sort up OT loose ends - and this is one of them. But I have no idea how to start. The majority of my screwups in my portfolio were done in 1st year (two years ago!!) I dont know how to fix up the mistakes I made as I wrote about stuff I no longer remember very well. Plus in 1st year I didnt have the faintest idea as to how to maintain a portfolio. And I feel really stupid about it as everyone else seems to have it sorted. Im ashamed to ask for help because of that and Im scared of asking for help because in my opinion, I dont think I could fare well with showing a lecturer my very messed up portfolio - I can imagine the look on their face - nor to a third year student as I know their all quite busy not to mention the most competitive bunch Ive ever studied with. I know this because when I did ask for help or direction I was bluntly turned down - they all hate sharing ideas unless its an enforced group paper.

Im getting frustrated just thinking about it.

I suppose theres not much to do except pray about it..
*Sigh

OOH Speaking of prayer, I had a big one answered the other day!
Sometimes I go to prayer meetings before church and we usually always pray for things we want at a community or national level and I remember someone praying for the haphazard north dunedin area (as you do) and about making couch burning illegal or something etc etc. I thought this was being prayed for from the wrong direction.
I personally dont see much "evilness" in couch burning as its been going on for decades. I voiced this and said that its not the couch burning thats the problem its the equation of:

alcohol (lets say woodstock and bourbon) + a random lighter + old smelly bacteria filled old couch

Burning said gross couch in the middle of a dunedin winter = fun

however

Those said burners with tummys of woodstock = extreme stupidity and increase in chance of ambulance needed.

The problem here of course is the alcohol. And WHO are the most frequent drinkers in north dunedin? Freshies of course (add a few 2nd years as well).
At this point I say out loud - GOD BLESS GEOFFREY PALMER!!

New Zealands ex prime minister who has convinced quite a few MPs of his new anti drinking ideas. Namely speaking raising the drinking age to 20.
20 years old is good. It cuts outs on 15-17 year olds getting their hands on alcohol from their 18 year old peers.
18-19 year olds however will probably still be able to get their hands on some speights as they'd probably know a 20 year old. But the cops would have the law on their side and those caught with alcohol would be punishable by the adult courts system not the youth court.

I am a christian and I drink. Im not ashamed of it either as Ive been taught by my mother to drink responsibly. So too did Jesus. Funny that.

But if these new law changes go through I think it would do a lot of good in preventing alcohol usage in teenagers. I think a lot of scarfies would agree with me that highschoolers are a pain in the butt to have in bars and with these changes couch burning would go back to the way it used to be - fun with marshmallows and "safer."
I hope this time round with a conservative government in power this might actually go through successfully.

Saiyonara!!

Shopping: Spiritual Warfare vs A need to keep women sane?

2009-04-16T17:44:00.000-07:00

So I got paid quite a bit this week - mainly for doing time and a half over the easter weekend, though because my clocking in and out was a bit munted up last week so I suspect Im not getting all I deserve.
Well, anyway I felt I really needed a new jersey - preferably red as the one I currently have is falling apart at the seams because I wear it all the time. So on payday I went into town and headed into Shanton, which incidently is a fantastic store with trends that are consistently ok to wear. Compared to the horrendous things you see in Supre and Glassons these days. Plus they have sale racks out the back which have a lot of tops and jerseys priced 50% off. I didnt find a jersey but instead I found a really classy top with the empire waist I so dearly love that was marked 60% off. I got it for 15 bucks - what a bargain.

It looks a bit like this but its a black and white pattern made of chiffon:

Next I thought, hell, lets check out Glassons (while ignoring the cheap 80's designs) and see what they have and I found my red jersey! Well its more of a coat, but its made of the same material as a hoodie which it practically is except for the longer length. Its classy but you can also wear it with jeans and normal top underneath as I am right now, plus its really warm to wear. This coat was the other day $60 but when I went in it was sold to me for $40 - SWEET!!

The next thing I did still makes me feel a bit guilty as my boyfriend would call this irresponsible shopping, and he is quite right. But oh lord, when was the last time I had nice presentable clothes that made me look professionally respectable and NOT like a student living under the poverty line. I went into a store that really only attracts rich women over the age of 30. I went into Jaqui. E. Actually let me rephrase, first I stood outside the store for ten minutes staring at this awesomely classy top that was on display:

The one that I was drooling over, wasnt this colour but was more of a peachy white hue and it was displayed on a manequin with a simple black trousers. It looked stunning. Simplicity is what gets my eye - but it was obvious to me that this top was very good quality merino and was undoubtedley going to have an expensive price tag. I can see it now - Cody shaking his head in laughter thinking, oh shes so predictable... Im imagining him rolling his eyes while imagining me going "Oooh! look at that!!" and going off path.
Yeah yeah yeah, I went in. Asked the price. $90 (oucheee). And I ask those five magical words: "Can I try it on?" Heres Cody going "oh god, shes in too deep now!"
You know what my main thought was while trying on this top. Ooh mum is soo going to approve of this top! So much she'll wish she owned it! Theres a sinful thought - right there! God forgive me.
Well, the store owner said it was 20% off and if I applied for a free VIP card Id get a further 20% off. Well, why not? But me trying to be sensible - I still put it on layby as I had a lot of other things to pay for like board food and petrol - which I didnt think off til I left the shop. And altimately I came up a bit short. But dont worry - thats been fixed by the wonderful institution of studylink!

A few of my female friends think I did good - considering I got all these items marked down by a substantial amount. But I still feel slightly guilty as Im used to being in the mindspace that I dont deserve nice new clothes. But I think thats a psychological complex from my childhood and the way I was raised. And also, Ive taught myself that God provides all we need - and I got the very obvious prod that I didnt neccesarily need these things as it would encourage pride of myself and envy from others and would make me want more.

But at the end of the day, I think of the Patriarchs Abraham, Issac and Jacob. Men who were on Canaans millionaire list back in the day. They were so rich (riches given by god of course) that kings feared them. I think the lesson here is that I need to be even MORE mindful of how I spend not when Im poor but when Im "rich". And to remember that money is a frequent traveler (it always comes and goes). When we get a lot of money, we're so tempted to spend it in clothes etc which we believe we deserve for our hard work. Which I honestly believe is fair enough. But the clothes etc should ONLY be seen as a side bonus not as the goal for which the money is earnt.
I hope that doesnt sound to preachy. But Im always amazed at how God provides for me and that he does care about what we like.
Why last year on placement in Auckland I was nagged by my medical superiors to own a pair of nice shoes so clients would respect me more as a professional and not an inexperienced scarfie. They had a point, but I told them I couldnt afford any and that was that. Not that they didnt stop nagging me. I told my host mum about it and she said why dont you ask your Dad (she means God) for a pair. I thought that response was really rediculous, I mean to me poverty builds character and if old folks didnt respect me because of my appearance then I was quite happy to prove them wrong in my experience as an under graduate therapist.
But lo and behold, someone from church found out my predicament and handed me a new pair of shoes that they bought but then couldnt wear for some reason. Later that same day I went into Hannahs with my host family and the manager pulls out a pair of beautiful winter boots that fitted me perfectly (considering Ive got slightly mismatched feet) and cost the exact amount of money that I had spare in my wallet.
Coincidence? I think not!!

Alright I'm going to head off now, adios and God Bless!

Awesome article

2009-03-31T19:02:00.000-07:00

Hey all you silent readers!

Read this awesome article of two nice guys from the States and what their doing.
WARNING - Potential warm fuzzies ahead!

http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/local/chi-compliment-guys-13-mar13,0,6849324.story

Camp, God Gifts & Co.

2009-03-31T17:02:00.000-07:00

So I went to 'Launch Camp' last weekend. It was the most awesome camp I'd ever been to personally, and I grew a lot and had a lot of fun as well. Ever since I've come home (to Dunedin), I've had so many questions and answers in my head. My questions were based on a revelation I had over myself about my abilities (helped by others too), and then understanding the reason for my 'talkativeness' through life. And with the answers I was like, ok now how do I use them in my life and church? The minute I figured out I'd recieved spiritual speaking gifts my mind went "whoosh..." of all the evidence I had over the course of my life to back them up. Which I cant be bothered typing out but if you want to know ask me in person. At camp when we were in prayer time I was filled with the holy spirit and I was told - yep, you're gonna be using your talking for ministry. At the time (being all confident in Gods plan) I said - great! when do I start? ...... This year.

Well, now Im back in Dunners, back to work etc. Im reading my bible like crazy and praying like mad but I'm now going through this phase I'll call "Having a Moses moment." Where Im starting to think WHAT??!! I don't think Im the right person to be involved with ministry. Im not the most moral christian in the world - why this morning I accidently let out a R13 curse word at the lady who ignored my indicating and stole my car park at a busy campus. Last night, I laughed my head off at a highly innappropriate song by Flight of the Concords regarding men and bumholes. And last night during a prayer meeting, someone was praying for a ban on couch burning and I whispered out aloud, "whats wrong with safe couch burning? Its almost a fun neccessity in winter. More like increasing the drinking age back to 21." Some people laughed, though Im sure the under 21 year olds didnt appreciate that.

See what I mean? But immediately I got a retort back from God saying ha! Look at Jonah, Moses and Rahab. And Im like alright ALRIGHT! No ones perfect. And I seriously am trying to be a good daughter. Ive been pretty good this week in relation to trusting him with money and food - being broke and all. Eating soup and frozen veges 3 times a day for a week was interesting...

Another answer I got at camp was mentoring. Mainly for me, though Im prepared to mentor if God puts the right person in front of me. I really want to meet some old folks from church but the thing with groups at church is that they're all very segregated. A pain in the butt really, but theres a ladys night out thingee being run by church at Nanking Palace in a few weeks and I thought great opportunity! I dont have the money but thats ok - Can you help me find 21 bucks Dad? Cheers) But last night practically everyone at life group said they wouldnt go - whining about the 21$ cost and how they wanted something cool like 4wdriving instead like what the boys had. Now hearing stuff like that gets me into a verbal rampage especially when they all verbally agreed that getting a mentor would be cool. HELLO??!! Ladys night out - awesomely older people to meet - eating awesome chinese food at (what Ive heard to be) at a nice restaurant??!! Why cant people draw the dots together for crying out loud?

I may be a sinner. But I say sorry, and I think that entitles me to use my god gifts of speaking encouragement to those who are using terrible negative excuses against Gods way of giving to our needs of serving one another in a fun environment. Some people dont know a good thing in front of them even if it dances naked in a tea cozy in front of them. (No, thankYOU JK Rowling for that wee gem)

Im seriously considering giving a 30second lecture about it, this comming Sunday service and Im scared off my tosh.

These are my two God gifts Im 95% sure Ive got. (Still need to work on interpreting tongues). If you want to look up yours the website is below. And for more info on how to use them I really recommend you read 1 Corinthians in your bible.

Encouragement

Encouragement (Speaking Gift) - The special ability God gives some to offer comfort, words of encouragement, hope, and reassurance to discouraged, weak, or troubled Christians in such a way that they are consoled.
People with this gift:
- come to the side of those who are discouraged to reassure them and give them hope
- emphasize God's promises and confidence in his will.

Romans 12:6-8
Titus 1:9
Acts 11:23-24
Acts 14:21-22
1 Thessalonians 2:11-12
1 Thessalonians 5:9-11

Tongues (speaking & interpreting)

Tongues (speaking) - The special ability God gives to some to speak prayer or praise in a language they have never learned or to communicate a message from God to His people. The special ability God gives to some to speak in a language not previously learned so unbelievers can hear God's message in their own language.

Tongues (interpreting) - The special ability God gives to some translate the message of one who speaks in tongues.

If tongues is spoken without an interpretation, the speaker is edified. If tongues is interpreted, it is for the edification of the church body.

People with this gift:
- may receive a spontaneous message from God which is made known to His body through the gift of interpretation
- may interpret a message from the Holy Spirit through someone else speaking in tongues
- communicate a message given by God for the church (if there is someone to interpret)
- speak in a language they have never learned and do not understand
- worship the Lord with unknown words too deep for the mind to comprehend
- experience an intimacy with God which inspires them to serve and edify others
- speak in tongues as a private prayer language
- when used in a group setting, an interpretation must take place, or else the one speaking tongues should remain silent.

1 Corinthians 12:7-11
1 Corinthians 12:28-31
1 Corinthians 14:1-40
Acts 2:1-12
Acts 10:44-46
Acts 19:1-7
Mark 16:17
Romans 8:26-27
1 Corinthians 13:1

(courtesy of www.kodachrome.org/spiritgift/refer.htm#Encouragement)

2009-03-26T20:54:00.000-07:00

Update on the money situation -

Nothing out of the ordinary happened. Truth be told my mum gave me the funds. I know not very exciting but hey, use what sources are given to you.

Gotta go to camp now :D

The Game of the Royal Way

2009-03-24T16:14:00.000-07:00

I bet anyone who reads the above title is wondering "what the..?"
Its not really a game - its more like this test of faith experiment this guy called Brother Andrew did in the fifties when he was a poor student at a non funded missionary school in Glasgow. Heres a link to his story http://www.sermonillustrator.org/illustrator/sermon5/royal_way.htm
So anyway, I have this guys autobiography called "Gods Smuggler" and a lot of stuff in the book has been poking me in my heart lately, the main one being obedience to God. Im pretty sure Im not the only christian who does this, but I have a nasty habit of listening to Gods advice (which Im lucky to hear loud and clear most days), and ignoring it with my own plan which I think is ultimately better. I know I know, how stupid can I get!? I have been snubbing my one true parent who knows me better than anyone and knows how things will turn out far better than I do. Its not always been like this. In my teens I was a pretty decent soldier in Gods army. I didnt evangelise or do impressive sermons etc but I did have incrediable trust and faith in God which has worn off somewhat now that Im not suffering in a Job like manner besides other things.

So anyway, back to my main point. Im comming back slowly and while doing this Im trying to figure out what God wants for me this year. So when I wrote my goals for this year in a recent post I made a kind of contract about socialising more which Im getting a definite thumbs up from God - but as Pastor Paul told us last week - contracts with God often have smallprint that we humans dont bother reading. Well, I figured out this morning what the smallprint was about - obedience.

So heres my story so far this week. Last week I stayed with my family up in Christchurch. In order to do this I left my car on campus down here in Dunedin. Two days ago, on my last day in chch I remembered about my car and started worrying about the potential state it would be in when I got back (this is north Dunedin folks - a cheap but not safe worthy place to keep a car). So I started praying and on the day I traveled back down to Dunedin I made a deal with God and it sounded like this

"Dad, I know it was stupid leaving my car on campus for a week without a steering wheel lock but what Could I have done otherwise at 11am on a Monday? I had no money for a taxi from my house and finding a carpark was enough of a nightmare anyway. The likelihood of my car being towed, nicked, burgled, burnt is overwhelmingly high, SO I'll make this deal with you. If my car is safe and sound where I left it, I will do everything in my power to get myself to this church camp this weekend which I personally dont know if I want to go to. Even though I have two days to make $35 which I dont have and I am also (I think) due to start work this weekend. Thats about it. Amen, cheers."

So I get to Dunedin, and lo and behold! My car is still there untouched after being left for a week on one of the dodgiest streets in North Dunedin. I thought OH MAN!! Now I HAVE to go to this camp!
Freaking out but nevertheless pleased my car was still alive I drove to a bible study meet only to find it wasnt on but was otherwise invited by the occupants of the flat to partake in some eating of ice cream. Does Melody turn down ice cream? NO! :D Plus I got this very distinct feeling that God had his hand all over this weird meeting of random strangers.
Now seeing as I have two days to get 35 bucks and a sleeping bag, the first thing on the agenda I would have done would be to sort out if I could forgo any weekend work I was given - but no....
I was with these nice people chatting about camp when God poked me on the shoulder and said

"Oi ask them if they have a spare sleeping bag, you never know... (chuckle). I mentally poked him back saying Oi yourself, Im gonna look like an arse if I get a sleeping bag then have to return it cos work wont let me off for the weekend, besides why would they give a stranger their sleeping bag when they probably want to use it themselves. God poked me back and said Stop talking dribble and trust me on this. Trust me trust me trust me. I says ALRIGHT alright!! Gawd!! Yes? Oh sorry bad use of a 21st century colloqulism, should really stop saying that. Yes you should."

I bet you know where this is going. Yes I got a sleeping bag - a really good quality one I might add. Back in my car, I sang my favorite worship song. It didnt cross my mind til I got home that cars arent sound proof and I just laughed. And went to bed feeling good that God loved a sinner like me.

Part two of this story, continued on this morning when I was driving to poltech via work. I was having another squabble with God about what to say to work.

"Melody, you will be allowed to go. Yeah sure but I'll get a massive lecture in return for wasting their time on roster scheduling, maybe I should use the 'death of a relative' excuse. Well, daughter thats a pretty low way to go, and should you do it, your camping experience will be tainted by your guilt of how you got there in the first place - by lying. Drat.., Puh puh pleeease, God can you change their hearts about not wanting me to go? If you let them let me go, I promise to put up with whatever they throw at me so long as I can go. I was being a weak sod before, sorry."

The outcome of this made me more gobsmacked than yesterdays sleeping bag issue. My supervisor, who is exactly like my old supermarket supervisor - someone who could make my life at work pretty nightmarish if I pissed her off. I walk up to her and asked to talk about the roster, so she took me out back and what do you know, I dont even have to work on Saturday or Sunday, only Friday. I asked her if I could reschedule that friday shift, she said yeah sure how bout this Saturday?...

The moment of truth....

I uhh.. err.. cant work this weekend cos I have to go away for a church camp.
Oh thats fine, You willing to work Monday instead?
(SAY WHAT??)

I can still hear God chuckling at me... I feel stupid lol.
Good things happen when you're obedient to God. Now THAT is The Royal Way

PS I'll let all you silent readers know what happens in my God quest to find money tomorrow.

Adios

To tai chi or not to tai chi...

2009-03-23T01:25:00.000-07:00

My mum dragged me along to her tai chi class tonight. The teacher is a guy I recognise but I couldnt remember his name. Anyway the guy shook my hand and again dragged me to the forefront when I stated I was a spectator and said "nonsense!" As per usual, I immediately felt stupid and embarressed in the first five minutes but I was doing as he said and after a little while I was doing this exercise that reminded me of an ancient mayan sun worshipping/mexicanwave thingee, and I started feeling SO RELAXED. And everytime I bent over my fingertips would get pins and needles which actually felt more nice than annoying. At that moment the teacher says " by now you should feel the energy want to FLOW out of your fingers..." I thought - wow thats quick. But for the majority of it I was frustrated, trying to focus (which Im not good at) and at the same time I was thinking man this is so good for me, I should really do this on a more regular basis.

Thats the thing people have to know about me - I can be the most commited person on any task/ goal I want to achieve if its intellectual. And I expect results consistently. The catch is that my archilles heel is sports. Im a commitment phobe. This is exactly why after nearly three years with my boyfriend, I have never joined up to his kung fu. Dont get me wrong, I LOVE KUNGFU - watching it that is. I absolutely love going along to his classes and watching as well as gradings, tournaments etc. I learn a lot. I enjoy sitting there theorizing as to how people could improve or why exactly they cannot put their foot through a piece of wood. Most of the time I know Im wrong as Cody usually mutters under his breath "...aww hes doin it wrong.. he should be doing it ...."

Anyway, im getting off track. After the lesson, I said to mum "was it the green tea or do I feel perky?" and she said "nah its the class." Plus the teacher was really nice and helpful and he stood in front of me while I was doing this centre of gravity movement thingee and he corrected me and said if I practiced and got good it would help my upper back which over the past two years has quickly gone out of whack from typing long hours. It was easy theory to grasp but in application it was bloody hard.

Plus the fees are cheaper than kung fu...

Its a toughie... Should I do it? My traveling around a lot doesnt help even though theres a chans martial arts all over the north island. Oh I dont know...

2009-03-19T03:32:00.001-07:00

These are the coolest motivational tidbits Ive seen in a long time and I felt loads better reading them:

Hammy vs ?????

2009-03-18T12:24:00.000-07:00

I know I said that the Pixar creation of the character Hammy is like discovering the animal version of me but lately its been getting a bit different. Being highly spiritual Ive been asking God what plans he has for me this year. I know what I want this year. Ive had five of the most boriest weeks of doing absolutely NOTHING in Dunedin. Most of the time is spent in my own little isolation of reading, doing jigsaws, sleeping 10 hours every day, driving to polytech just to use the internet where nothing interesting happens on my facebook and the only emails I get are dodgy (but very funny) forwards from my boyfriend in chch and spam.
Ive got a plan of what I want to do this year and its a massive list in this order:

Get a much better job than bloody McDonalds
Pay off my second overdraft
Pay my debtors back ie family
Go swimming more
Complete my leftover papers at polytech
Clean up my OT portfolio
Study up on mental health and community placements
Become a regular blood donor
Go to more church camps
Get back in contact with Salmond College friends
Get started my charity of cleaning up historical graves started
Do some genealogical research
Get my full licence
Start memorising scripture that I like
Join 'Critic's book review team (still a maybe)

I cant think of anymore to be honest. The main point Im trying to get across is that all these activites make me sound like a spoilt sloth and Im being honest in saying I actually do have the time for all of these activities. The reason I havent been doing anything and thus getting depressed is all because of lack of money. It took me ages to actually get a job but I had no idea the process at McDonalds would take SO LONG!!

One of the hardest things in returning to an extra year in Dunedin (a city I dont want to live in), a year of doing a lot of personal activities is reminding me of my lack of friends. Quite frankly I did not see this comming over the past few years. I move around so much that it has been hard to maintain friendships not to mention make friends while working full time at placements around the country while being in an incrediably full on polytech degree course. I had/have my boyfriend and my family. I learnt from experience at highschool that "friends" are an added stressor. And in dunedin its been very hard to find friends who are like me in their spiritual walk. I find it difficult to maintain patience with fellow christians who preach to me the evilness of my relationships and lifestyle. Its highly possible that God does want me to achieve more and work harder at witnessing to those around me, but in my life that is harder than it looks. My family is more lasse faire and run by the "walk the talk" rule, in fact - scripture in my family is a more private thing done only by ourselves for ourselves. The majority of my family hence do not go to church except for myself on a regular basis. This why I have this internal fight with other christians. I agree with them but my life and experience says otherwise. Majority of them were raised in loving sheltered christian 24/7 families. I wasnt at all. My life was like that of the prophet Daniel. All prayer and bible study was done in secret and I despite comming out a better person than before, I definitely had lions den experiences.

But enough about that - what Im trying to get at is how hard this socialising is for me. And Im hoping that with joining a few clubs and whatnot I'll get there.
So at the moment Im feeling more Eeyore than Hammy

Ive been tagged for a book quiz thingee!

2009-03-17T03:42:00.000-07:00

Which book do you irrationally cringe away from reading, despite seeing only positive reviews?
The Secret by Rhonda Byrne. I cant BELIEVE that Oprah recommended this book! I admit I could have some bias being a christian but I really do think "thinking positive thoughts to encourage good stuff to happen to you" is a load of shit and the author just wanted to make a quick buck from doing a new age self help book. Some people will believe anything..

If you could bring three characters to life for a social event (afternoon tea, a night of clubbing, perhaps a world cruise), who would they be and what would the event be?
Ron Weaseley because I love his blunt but humorous personality; Hawkeye Bonner for his cool stories and old fashioned logic and Ayla so she could teach me how to skin and cook animals and show me how to do stuff with herbs.

(Borrowing shamelessly from the Thursday Next series by Jasper Fforde): You are told you can’t die until you read the most boring novel on the planet. While this immortality is great for awhile, eventually you realise it’s past time to die. Which book would you expect to get you a nice grave?
Northhanger Abbey by Jane Austen. It is the only one of her books that I seriously did not enjoy and thought the plot and characters were incrediably boring. I love the other books though. Its just that I found this book a massive disappointment compared to its counterparts.

Which book have you pretended, or at least hinted, that you’ve read, when in fact you’ve been nowhere near it?
War and Peace. Im used to reading classical literature but Ive never actually finished that book - I keep trying though. Its one of those books you cant read in bed and you have to focus which Im no good at at night.

As an addition to the last question, has there been a book that you really thought you had read, only to realise when you read a review about it/go to ‘reread’ it that you haven’t? Which book?
I cant recall this ever happening to me as I remember all books Ive read and definitely which ones I havent.

You’ve been appointed Book Advisor to a VIP (who’s not a big reader). What’s the first book you’d recommend and why? (if you feel like you’d have to know the person, go ahead of personalise the VIP)
Holes by Louis Sachar. Its one of the most fantastic childrens books out there that adults can thoroughly enjoy as well. It has an easy plot and awesome characters and a good ending, plus its not a big read either. Whats not to like?

A good fairy comes and grants you one wish: you will have perfect reading comprehension in the foreign language of your choice. Which language do you go with?
Ooh thats a hard one, either Greek, Hebrew or Latin. I would love to use any of them to read old biblical texts or if I happen to go overseas and explore an old Italian library or something.

A mischievous fairy comes and says that you must choose one book that you will reread once a year for the rest of your life (you can read other books as well). Which book would you pick?
Pride and Prejudice. I read it so often Ive practically memorised it anyway and I never get sick of the storyline

I know that the book blogging community, and its various challenges, have pushed my reading borders. What’s one bookish thing you ‘discovered’ from book blogging (maybe a new genre, or author, or new appreciation for cover art - anything)?
Havent really "discovered" anything new to do with books through blogging to be honest.

That good fairy is back for one final visit. Now, she’s granting you your dream library! Describe it. Is everything leatherbound? Is it full of first edition hardcovers? Pristine trade paperbacks? Perhaps a few favourite authors have inscribed their works?
I picture my library having at least two big bay windows and plenty of light. The biggest want is the majority of the wall space covered in shelving from the floor to the ceiling with a revolving ladder around the whole room. I'd want all my well read or classical books in protective hardcover and have them all by topic then author. Thered be bean bags and nice comfy couches and a harry potterish fireplace and giant paintings of ancestors, famous people I admire.

I won't tag anyone specifically for this, but if you're reading consider yourself tagged.

Final reflection on groupwork

2008-11-06T16:02:00.000-08:00

I recently completed my final viva with my group. Our communication was A LOT BETTER. I tried incredibly hard to work within a team. However there are a couple of things that I am really anti about.
Im pretty sure that some members didnt trust me and I sure as hell didnt trust them. Once again, a vital bit of research was left up to me regarding assessments for a fake client. I chose the functional capacity evaluation. Due to the fact that this week all of us have been stressed getting our papers done and that the viva wasnt even going to be marked, I didnt do thorough research into the FCE. But I for one had loads on it. In the viva, another member got asked about the FCE in relation to the biomechanical model and the case. She screwed it up alright - then blamed me. Firstly - not my fault that she was reading off her own notes not mine, second - I wanted to answer the question to help her out but my teacher has already previously accused me of being domineering so I shut up. And finally - why the hell was I persecuted for not researching enough into this assessment when I was the only bloody person who contributed assessment ideas in the first place?!! No one else did. Im sorry that I put my papers first - SO SORRY... OMG just sue me as I committed the biggest groupwork crime of all time.. Boohoo get over it.

There is no way that anyone has the right to undermine and make me feel like shit every time I try to work with them. I worked bloody hard on that viva and and with the others but the amount of snide little comments aimed at me was incredibly hurtful not to mention unprofessional.
The only thing I'm telling myself is this -
I work hard
I study hard
I am assertive and I stand up for myself
I back myself up well
I bring down people who try to think they can get away with putting down others just to make themselves feel better.
I NEVER tolerate gossip and nitpicking.

Therefore, I think it makes sense that people who do silent bullying like that really really hate me. Cause it means that I try to ruin their control of things. They are threatened by me.

Thats my rant for today. No more stuff about groups.

My first group reflection

2008-11-02T23:43:00.000-08:00

My first group reflection occurred on the 7th of October. At the time I obviously did not type out the reflection because it didnt go the way I wanted the experience to go but now I see it as a good learning experience. I can still remember what I said because I did a previous paper on the same reflection.

My account was of my first fieldwork experience. I had two supervisors(male and female). Both were really good occupational therapists and outstanding people. One of the supervisors however had a really thick accent which I had a lot of difficulty interpreting what he wanted me to do and felt embarrassed for everytime I had to say "Sorry, what did you say??.." Because it was my first fieldwork placement I would also like to add my inexperience at how to manage myself and knowing my limitations and my values and beliefs. I had (back then) very perfectionistic tendencies which I bought with me into my studies. In all cases it was me taking on too much and not knowing how to organise myself. But despite this weakness, I was very assertive. I asked a lot of questions, made friends easily with adults and stuck up for myself readily.

I then relayed to my group of an instance that occurred between myself and my male supervisor (with the thick accent). It happened approximately late in my third week. It was lunch time, and I was writing my notes down from the sessions with the students and starting on some paperwork for my other supervisor. My male supervisor promptly came in and interrupted me with some paperwork and recapping he wanted to do with me. I said yeah sure, can you give me 15mins to finish this other stuff? Sure he says. I went back to typing whatever. 5 mins later he interrupted me again with some more work he had found for me then asked me for the paperwork that I owed him.
This really pissed me off, because I could only mutitask and prioritise so much. I didnt say much except to again ask him to ask again later as I had a lot of work to do.
He got very angry at this stage and yelled at me, saying I should be doing the work he set up for me. At this, I too got angry that he was even talking to me in this manner and stood up and told him to back off and that I was working bloody hard for him and the other supervisor and that he had no right to talk to me like that. We both immediately stormed off in opposite directions.

Several influences contributed to that event and us sorting it out. Firstly, I knew my supervisor was incrediably stressed by a wedding he was planning the next day. So for the past couple of days he had inadvertantly sniped at a couple of staff members who all agreed he should not have been at work. I myself thought I handled him yelling at me pretty well. I knew he was a fantastic guy and supervisor and I myself am one of those people who dont judge people by how they act when they're stressed. Also, I'm pretty sure I was the first student nay first young person to stand up to him and stand my ground and I think that shocked him.
Later on that same day, he came up to me and apologised for his behaviour. In a REALLY humble sincere way too.

I was really disappointed at my groups response for varous reasons after telling this story. Firstly, at least two members made out my former supervisor to be a nasty sounding monstor. I was also annoyed at the teacher who pointed out that I was making biased assumptions of my own in the personality similarities between my former supervisor and my step father (who were both from the same town and county in Scotland). I could have (not that I was aware of doing so) - but I was just trying to point out that I understood my supervisors values and beliefs based on his culture.
Secondly, a number of members agreed that I should have laid an formal complaint. I did privately with my other supervisor but not to Otago Polytechnic, as I was worried about how this would affect my working relationship with him. I wanted to sort it out in an adult manner and I felt I did that, especially with standing up for myself with such outward decorum.
After, the feedback I felt as if the majority of the issue I had relayed was all my fault. I was trying to be open minded but I felt as if the group had no perspective from my eyes and were only relaying their own immediate advice - which we later we found out was not the point of the group. Thinking back now, I think I wanted positive feedback for the way I managed the situation and discussion of how I could have done it differently. All of which did not occur.
I did not feel as if I benefitted at all from that group reflection.

Groups

2008-10-14T16:38:00.000-07:00

Bugger... Bugger... Bugger...

I've screwed up - big time. And I am sorely regretting my actions not to mention my attitude.

A fortnight ago, my lecturers put us into groups of five to work on our intervention plans for one case study. Each group had to produce only one intervention plan.
In the first week, everyone was putting all of their effort into our physiology/dysfunction exam which was comming up. Now my way of relaxing is reading, so in my spare moments I read through and made notes on all the suggested article readings. It wasnt boring at all - in fact really interesting and I saw the case in a new light (I previously thought it looked too hard).

The following week, the group all got together to discuss the short term and long term goal we would make and some ideas for the intervention plan. There was only three of us there I think. I statrted getting really frustrated with some because I had all these ideas as well as all the rationale to support the ideas but no one took them because they didnt understand how they were relevant. I asked them if they read the suggested readings and no they hadnt (at that time). This really annoyed me as I really wanted to get on with it and plan as soon as possible.
At this stage, I made the mistake of thinking only my knowledge and understanding was superior - BIG MISTAKE. To this day I still think my ideas were really decent, I just didnt include the ideas of the others. Sure they were initially behind me in the reading department, but what I didnt realise was that they caught up and all understood the synthesis between the model and the plan a lot better than I did.

One thing that still annoys me though is that all of our communication was shit. We all agreed before the weekend that we would work on our sections of the intervention plan. My bit was getting more rationale quotes. We would then forward these improvements via email and have the end product ready for Monday morning to be handed in. My internet crashed on the weekend so I didnt get mine done til Sunday evening which worried me a bit cos I thought everyone would think I ditched them. I got my emails working and found that no one emailed me anything. The plan was due in the next morning at 9am and I was really worried and slightly angry at the possibility that the others had left me to do the entire writeup. One key mistake I did here was sent out an emergency email (around midnight) asking everyone to meet me at the pc suite first thing in the morning to sort the paperwork out. Of course no one read their emails that morning and didnt come in til 9am. So with one other member, I wrote out the whole intervention plan from memory of what I thought we had agreed on the previous week. I did the whole thing and boy was I pissed off when I got to class.

The others didnt finish their plan til later Monday afternoon. About 6 hours after the due date, I wasnt involved at all (mainly cos I was so pissed off). I didnt realise at the time that the other members were just as pissed off at me for handing a separate one in.

The next day after I had calmed down and learned that everyone was pissed off I apologised to the group and tried to explain why I had done what I did without accusing anyone. We managed to ask to lecturer to get mine back to check if they were similar. Because we werent technically allowed to change the plan I had handed in, another member and myself quickly perused the two and realised they werent too different and that mine would be kept but would have some things added to it. I thought my plan still went along pretty well with theirs so I kept the majority of it in. No one knew this as we were under a really stressful time constraints not to mention a suspicious glare fro the teacher, therefore we didnt have time to bring the whole team together to go over it.

Today we all sat together and talked over the plan. I found out that their ideas were more specific than mine but didnt flow with the plan I had handed in. Boy did I have to do some minor grovelling. We sorted out what we were going to say tomorrow at the viva but we all decided that I would be left up to explaining the screw up in the last section of the treatment plan.

I know, that the majority of the fault here is mine. I accept that mistake and take responsibility for it. But I feel like some of this was screwed up because

I did earlier readings. And no one understood my explanations from this research.
The whole weekend thing was a fiasco - part of that was out of my power and I do not think I should be persecuted for taking action against the disorganization of other members.
Not everyone turned up to meetings/tutorials.

This is really depressing for me and a real eye opener into my attitude of groups. At this point I must say quite honestly that I am a fiercely independent person. I do work well with others really well so long as their personality and way of explaining things are similar to my own.
I know I know... Not good future OT material but I working on it. For some reason (and please take my word for this) I am way better at this sort of thing in placements. I like hierarchies, and I like working with older professionals who I know will listen to me early on in the process and will take on board my suggestions.
At polytech a lot of the time I feel very verbally incompetent. Dont get me wrong I am a confident speaker, its just others not understanding what I'm talking about. This sometimes happens in my personal life as well but never on placement. Why the hell cant I be understood like this all the time??!!

Now I'm off to study for that viva tomorrow - so help me God.

Adios
Melody

Unproffessional and unsupportive supervisors suck! >:-(

2008-08-04T17:03:00.001-07:00

I just finished a tutorial for my class 'Collaboration and Consultation', where we talk about ethical or just simply any issue that caused a bit of internal struggle.

Two of the stories caught my attention. Both students were talking about a time when either their professional or personal personality did not mesh with another person. The first student talked about her last OT supervisor whom she pointed out to us immediately, to the fact that this supervisor wasnt being professional AT ALL.

I dont know how much I want to mention except to say that these 'professional' OT's attitudes were shocking. One was said to be obviously burnt out from working in mental health for 40 years who saw no problem with man handling patients, bluntly said that they hated the last student because they asked "too many questions" (!) denying group resources to patients. They also never negotiated with the student about supervision, never offered feedback and gave the student a full caseload with no assistance much to the annoyance of the student. There was loads more but I cant remember. them all
OMG....
This kind of thing really pisses me off. We pay over 5000 dollars a year to study and do placements. Registered OTs get some kind of point system from the NZOT Board (part of competencies too I think) every time they have a student - no matter how the placement went. This is not the first supervisor issue I've heard of. I think as a student- we have the right to demand a PROFESSIONAL supervisor. Whos also supportive and patient and have standards so we as the student can admire and look up to and raise our standards of care to the utmost highest. A good working relationship is essential and I always feel disappointed for my peers who dont achieve that. (Can be the student as well).

I feel very blessed to have had placements where I ended up with placements I never even put in my list but ended up making the most of my time and having an awesome placement and a wonderful supervisor and meeting lots of great people. They were all different of course with different styles etc and what ever issues we had we sorted them out maturely and appropriately.

One thing I will say is (be warned though), why are all the nasty stories I hear of, are those concerning much older (and I mean really old) OT's. Is our training and societal ways and health standards evolving so much that they cant keep up with all the change and just remain in their own ways in order to avoid a long headache?
Hey - dont shoot the messenger. I'm not at al going to judge very OT over the age of 50 to be unprofessional (dont be stupid). But if any OT (from all ages) is uncompromising, dictator like and unsupportive and unwilling to negotiate about stuff then I will really have a problem with them and even more pissed off with school supervisors who also do not offer support and just tell us to get over it and to just treat it as "an excellent learning experience!"

5+ weeks of that?
Get a grip...

I love FOOD and Jamie Oliver

2008-08-02T19:43:00.000-07:00

Now people I promise I study after this post as I've been procrastinating all day!

Right so onto todays topic.
I came across Jame Olivers website today (www.jamieoliver.com) - brilliant!

Heres a link to the recipe Im gonna have a hand at: http://www.jamieoliver.com/recipes/desserts/rhubarb_and_custard_kinda_souffle

"I became a subscriber pretty quickly and asked the forum this question:
Hi everyone!
I'm a uni student from NZ and I live in a flat with four other lovely girls. Seeing as I'm way to poor to even start a kitchen item collection yet, I was wondering if its possible to use ceramic plain cups instead of ramekins? Or other types of cups for that matter. I really want to try out jamies rhubarb and custard souffle recipe. Looks good!
Advice anyone?"

Again, I would so appreciate advice from anyone out there who knows about this aye.

Ok thats me for today. I know it doesnt have much to do with OT but to me cooking is OT to
me!!

Cya!

Xbox

2008-07-30T21:10:00.000-07:00

Ive been working on a case study for a paper called Integration of Practice.
The case study is about a 14 year old boy called Josh (pseudonym) and I have to make an intervention plan thats focused on aggression. Josh plays xbox most nights til 5am in the morning and as a result he hardly goes to school and when he does he have shown aggressiveness to peers and teachers as well as to his parents. Josh has been expelled before from another school and left another voluntarily. He likes to also skateboard (alone) and play online with buddies. (There are major other issues as well but I can only focus on aggression) There are a lot of things I dont know that I'd like to know like:

What is the parental history of his parents. What style of parenting do they use? What punish and reward systems do they use?
What do his two siblings do with their day? What are they into?
Has he physically met his online buddies?
What xbox games does he play? (I suspect GTA & Halo)
In what way is he aggressive to his parents?
Is he interested in any other games
Is he interested in the future and what he wants to do?

One thing thats really nagging me and its so simple but I know I cant use it. Get rid of the xbox. As plain and simple as that. But if Josh is my client as well as the parents that would not be a great start. In fact it would ruin any initial developments of rapport.

I have a few ideas (other than above lol):

Communication skills (self awareness, assertiveness, expressing aggressiveness appropriately)
Community sport involvement (sport= exercise+endorfins&tiredness+social interaction)

Routine: structure set hours of xbox time with spec games. Evaluate with parents appropriateness of games. PLUS set sleep hours (if xbox in bedroom negotiate having it in lounge). Set up reward system for this.

I might put the communication skills and routine as a priority then add the sport thing later (I'm limited in how much I put in intervention plan).
I'd really appreciate some feedback on this by my non existent readers (HELLO OUT THERE!)

I'm definitely going to use the above two now that I've looked at them. Its just finding the rationale now. I have no experience in child truancy casework just so you know so I'm very VERY new at this.

PS I forgot to mention - My intervention HAS to be based on the Behavioural Approach model

Adios

O be joyful

2008-07-28T17:23:00.000-07:00

Good news folks
Im allowed to redo my design paper extramurally next year. PRAISE GOD! woop woop! So that means I will not be doing my degree part time and I will graduate at the same time as everyone else so long as I keeps my wits a lot better this semester and not screw up.
I dont know. Theres just something so satisfyingly motivating about failure. Dont get me wrong - I was very lucky and I'm not the type of person to be so lighthearted about my career. But it makes me think of Thomas Edison. Brilliant American. Made thousands of mistakes and only a few successes. I like to think that with those few successes he made (which changed technology in the world forever) I bet he learnt to celebrate well. Old school music, vintage wine, party games mmmMmmm. That is how I'm thinking right now and boy am I joyful. My partner is also happy about this because it means he doesnt have to wait more that 3 years for me to come home (hes in Christchurch I'm in Dunedin).

Second happy thing to report: I am so far on top of my papers. Considering I'm redoing one this semester this is excellent stuff.

Still practicing my finger spelling. Though to be honest I do a lot of it in private or when I'm bored or waiting etc. Need to work on my vowels I think. Ive keep mixing up the english version of A,E,I,O,U to the Japanese version of A,I,U,E,O (I can speak a little Japanese).

Also: My homestay has gone through yay!! So in two weeks I'm going to Auckland to work at a stroke rehab clinic. I'm really excited as I'm really facinated with this line of work and I've also never worked in a community setting before. Looking forward to it. My blessing is that the woman who I'm going to live with, lives in the same suburb as the clinic. How rare is that?! Im gonna save so much on petrol. The downside is that board costs are a lot more than I earlier thought which leaves only $50 left for myself out of my $1000 grant. Dammit! No new pair of sneakers for me then...

Had two tutorials today. Both pretty much the same topics: Leadership styles in client groups and client/colleague consultation. I have to do some quiz that tells me what kind of leader I am. To finish off this blog I already found the answer to that in a quote I found in Time magazine about Nelson Mandela's rules of Leadership:

"Lead from the back — and let others believe they are in front"
Mandela loved to reminisce about his boyhood and his lazy afternoons herding cattle. "You know," he would say, "you can only lead them from behind." He would then raise his eyebrows to make sure I got the analogy.

As a boy, Mandela was greatly influenced by Jongintaba, the tribal king who raised him. When Jongintaba had meetings of his court, the men gathered in a circle, and only after all had spoken did the king begin to speak. The chief's job, Mandela said, was not to tell people what to do but to form a consensus. "Don't enter the debate too early," he used to say.

During the time I worked with Mandela, he often called meetings of his kitchen cabinet at his home in Houghton, a lovely old suburb of Johannesburg. He would gather half a dozen men, Ramaphosa, Thabo Mbeki (who is now the South African President) and others around the dining-room table or sometimes in a circle in his driveway. Some of his colleagues would shout at him — to move faster, to be more radical — and Mandela would simply listen. When he finally did speak at those meetings, he slowly and methodically summarized everyone's points of view and then unfurled his own thoughts, subtly steering the decision in the direction he wanted without imposing it. The trick of leadership is allowing yourself to be led too. "It is wise," he said, "to persuade people to do things and make them think it was their own idea."

I would so love to have that man as a grandad...

End of 1st week back

2008-07-26T20:14:00.000-07:00

Bit slow to start but not too bad. Half way through the week I realised I left my folders and portfolio at home. Not too worried though as I go home again in under 2 weeks.

One thing has got my attention though. All the papers were put in the entry foyer to be collected and my design paper isnt there. The mark isnt online either. Looks like I'm going to have to suck up my pride and ask the lecturer whats going to happen. If I've fully failed the paper (not offered a special) I pray I'll get away with doing that paper at the same time as next semesters as well... I really hate the idea of graduating 4 months after everyone else and thus being held back 4 months so I wouldnt be able to move back to chch asap.

Anyway on the next bit of news.
I really REALLY enjoy my new papers. They have a lot more of an interesting factor to them compared to last semester. And I'm particularly happy to have my old psychology lecturer back. I got an A- in his last class. A really likable guy who makes everyone work hard for his good marks.

Last semester I had to make this blog for my participation in occupation paper. This semester for POII I have to take up a new hobby and do an interest piece on it as my paper. Ive decided to learn New Zealand Sign Language (NZSL). Its similar to the British version I've heard and I'm practicing fingerspelling in front of the mirror at the moment. So far all I know how to sign is: hello my name is melody and the sign for bullshit (which my boyf loves to show me). Understanding fingerspelling is all I'm going to work on for now. Then I'll start on basic sentences and vocab.
Its a bit harder than I thought it would be. Last time I tried this was in my first placement where I made friends with the speech therapist there and she taught me makaton (speaking and signing). I learnt about 500 signs in about a week and could sign and understand simple dialogue without speaking. I dont have anyone to practice with nor encourage me this time plus no one to correct me if I start making mistakes. Oh well.
Ive been a gestural talker my whole life. In fact that is where my beginnings are. When I was a toddler I was developmentally behind in language skills. My mother told me she was actually really worried at that point as the majority of the communication skills I used where facial, gestural and guttural (noises instead of words).
My mother being a deeply spiritual woman prayed a help cry of "God make her speak!!". Apparently I have never shut up since lol.
But even as a child I had speaking difficulties and needed speech therapy myself til my last year in primary school. Mum considered putting me down a level a couple of times but I'm glad she didnt.
Today I am a massive talker. Communication isnt hard for me and recently it got me into a spot of trouble in my last placement. Nothing major though. I've learnt to control what and how I say things in a professional setting now. Of course I've never been like that to clients. And I've NEVER talked about clients innappropriately.
What helped me later on I think was my enourmous appetite for books. Im still a big reader but back in Year nine I was already reading at a very high level. After that I learnt how to read very fast as well as being able to pick up on details.

Before I go -
Im wondering if it would be a good idea to show what signs I learn here. Which would mean Id have to put them on youtube first I suppose... I'd love to get feedback from anyone who knows NZSL.

Saiyonara

Phew

2008-07-21T20:03:00.000-07:00

Wow, I am so glad to be back!!

I had a lot going against me last semester. Enough to make me think I might not pass my coursework. The worst of the worst happened to me which of course was my own fault. My laptop got stolen TWO DAYS before 3 major papers were due. As because I had earlier lost my memory stick I had made no second copy.
Secondly, after realising in my last week of assessment that I had completely mismanaged my study time that semester - I began to get very VERY depressed. But dont misconstrue my words - I hadnt gone out at all last semester. My whole being surrounded study and placement. Others and myself knew I was a workaholic - which I have been since highschool. I just studied the wrong papers at the wrong time.

Funnily enough the moment when I knew my laptop was stolen I was strangely calm as if "No biggee, I can handle this... I can redo 3 papers in five hours... Yep...
Anyway, after my laptop was stolen and having had only 5 hours sleep in five days I started to break. Mentally, physically and emotionally.
Later at night I broke down after discovering I had given myself mild insomnia. After giving up my holidays to study, I had not seen my partner nor my caring mother in nearly three months. I guiltily called my mother at 4am and ranted and sobbed for an hour and when I finished I apologised profusely for calling her to which she said - without missing a beat - I'm comming darling.

God I love my mum. She drove for six hours from Christchurch to Dunedin just to do the job she loves the most. Awesome... She even bought my fox terrier Jenna along too!
A day later (after a full nights sleep thanks to mum and the pup) and I drove back to Christchurch in my car while following mum. I didnt tell Cody (my boyfriend) as I wanted to surprise him which I did.

Good news:
So anyway I went home for a three week holiday, recovered. Slept a lot, had great sex, got back into exercising, and hung out with mum and Cody and my extended family (a pregnant auntie, grandmother, grandfather and Codys family. My teachers luckily gave me an extention which I completed and handed in on time.

Second piece of good news. Out of all my papers I failed only one! The one I failed I knew I would anyway. The others I passed, miraculously I got a b+ on the paper I had to redo. FROM SCRATCH!! Amazing. I know, for those who know me well, it sounds as if Ive drastically lowered my standards of academic work. But I've promised myself it will be the complete opposite by the end of the year.

Classes
Now the second semester has started and I have a fresh array of papers to work on.
My new papers are:
Disability, Function & Occupation II
Integration of Practice II
Participation in Occupation II
Collaboration and Consultation
Group Work
Intro to Frames of Reference
Reflection in Practice (a paper I'm redoing extramurally)

I love them all!!
I'm so going to get into them!!
Anyway, I better go and do some study now. I'll talk about my next placement and one of my papers next time...

Renovation + motivation = efficacy (OT ?)

2008-07-01T00:56:00.000-07:00

I love listening to my mum talk about her renovation plans. She bought her first home a while ago in North New Brighton in Chch which 5 years ago would have been an awful place to consider but is now a lot nicer now. So anyway, mum bought this very average house that obviously needs a lot of work.
Shes been living there over a year now and shes already made big improvements. My favorite being a brand new granite kitchen bench, chrome taps and new curtains that mum made.
And recently shes just finished putting pink batts up in the ceiling.
I'm so proud of her. For her this is true occupational therapy for the soul. When she was married she was forced into a very controlled housewifely type of role. She still cooks and cleans like the pro she is, but now I absolutely burst with happiness when she tells me proudly of all the 'handyman' jobs shes been doing, and doing well (very practical and creative my mum is).
The house is comming along nicely.
Maybe I should start taking photos for before and after shots aye?

Stressed!!!

2008-06-17T20:00:00.000-07:00

OMG OMG OMG.....

So stressed right now. And I'm starting get really pissed off at my Uni friends after a convo I had with earlier this week:

"You doing exams Melody?"
"Sort of."
"What you got?"
"1 exam, 4 papers and a Viva"
"That sounds easy..."
"Do you know what a viva is?"
"Yeahhhhsort of... its an interview isnt it?"
"Yeah, kinda. I've been practicing a lot with the rest of my tute group but I'm still worried."
"Meh, I bet I'd whiz it."
"I dont think so.. you're a 2nd year med student, you havent even studied the chemical impact of strokes yet let alone how it affects human functioning."
"Well, you make it sound like your course is easy."
"Thats cos I love the papers. Doesnt mean their not bloody hard though."
"Well its only 3 years.. Mine will take 13 more years.."
"Meh.. Well I considered doing med, but I like OT cos of how broad it is. You can be an OT anywhere. I can be as creative as I want and its really fun."
"I'll be saving lives.."
"So will I... In the long run."
"Meh."
"Meh."
"What qualification do you get again?"
"Bachelors degree."
"Ohhh, arent you at the polytech though?"
"Yeah..."
"When did they start doing degrees?"
"Probably about ten years ago."
"Are you sure its a degree?"
"What does it matter? I dont care what piece of paper I get so long as I'm an OT at the finish. It is cool that its a degree though."
"Its probably not the same as a university bachelors degree..."
"Oh shut up...!"

You know what this reminds me of?
How right before WWI, the entire community of Europe labeled Turkey as "the old sick man."
When I meet people for the first time and they ask me what I'm studying, I proudly say degree in OT. and they say, oh where at? Otago. Otago Uni? Wow..... Nah, Otago Polytech. Oh real?... Errr cool (weird look...).
I'm absolutely sick and tired of hearing so many snide comments from Uni students that the only people who go to polytech are highschool dropouts. I am one of the top NCEA 3 History (2006) students in the country!!! I'd consider myself pretty academically up there you know?!
Does it ever occur to these smarmy uni students that your intelligence is not rated by academic IQ but by learning style? I ought to hit them over the head with a VARK textbook.

My partner and my brother are both incrediably intelligent, though on quite a few occasions I do feel dumb around them as their practical experience far out weighs my own. One is an appentice engineer who is also a passionate kung fu instructor and the other is an Army trained chef who also loves personal training. Both have virtually no debt and are doing very well for themselves, and both are continuosly learning other skills as well.

My flatmate is doing a PhD in anatomy & physiology. Her debt is nearly 50,000, and shes proud of the fact that she will be eventually titled Dr. She also told me that shes extremely over qualified and has never found a highly paid job of her liking....

Hmmmmmmmmm.
By the way, I not saying University is bad. Theres a couple of post grad papers I've heard of that sound really interesting to do further down the track...
All I'm saying is:
Otago Polytechnic does not deserve to be called nor treated as "the poor slutty cousin of Otago University" !!
Tech pride people!!!
Tech pride...

PS Hey you Bill Rob library techno's!! the system changed 6 months ago, dont think we've forgotten that you all promised to get off your arses and make thew library computors more accessable to Tech students. And that includes wireless!

God I feel so much better after that rant...
Now back to study...

Hootie & the Blowfish

2008-06-15T21:43:00.000-07:00

Did you like that song that just played?

Its awesome! My favorite band of all time

Hootie & the Blowfish

Check out their site where you can listen to really good live albums!!

Sprinkle sum heads depending on how good they are" HAHAHA!!

2008-06-07T23:34:00.000-07:00

We talk a lot about this in lectures: Meaningful occupation.
Well in my opinion, the best meaningful occupation in the world is laughter. Im a massive advocate for watching comedy skits etc whenever I am stressed angry, homesick, upset and even when I'm having a night in with some hawaiian pizza.
The world would get along better if comedy was compulsory to everyone.

Every week I'm going to do a tribute to great comedians and ventriloquists, that includes the occasional talented actor in the mix.

This week: In honour of New Zealand's greatest comedian ever - Billy T James (RIP).

Billy T. James, MBE (born William James Taitoko, 1948; died August 7, 1991) was a well known and much loved entertainer and comedian from New Zealand. He was famous for his black singlet, yellow towel around the neck and a characteristic chuckle that he claimed was inspired by Māori children.

Never a man to take himself seriously, he once said: 'I'm half Māori and half Irish: one half of me wants to get pissed and the other half doesn't want to pay for it.' When Maori activist Hana Jackson, lamenting the Māori suicide rate, said that each suicide should each take a white person with them (widely misquoted as "Kill a white") he joked, 'What about a half-caste like me? What do I do, just wound myself?'
In the 1980s, Billy T became a household name through variety show Radio Times and the eponymousThe Billy T. James Show in 1984–6. His film career blossomed around this time, too, with a notable role in Ian Mune's Came a Hot Friday.

Holidays here I come!!

2008-06-06T06:51:00.000-07:00

I've finished all my blogs!!!
WOOP WOOP!!
That means that I'm gonna know talk about stuff that I like!!
Like:
Cooking
Homemaking
Advice on shopping online
Cyber networking
Harry Potter Fan Fiction
Book Crossing
OCCUPATIONAL THERAPY!!
Male vs Female Comedy
And featured articles, pictures and videos on anything I damn well please!!

You know, I've had such a productive day today and I learnt something really interesting. I SUCK AT STUDYING WITH OTHER OT STUDENTS. Its like so bloody competitive which freaks me out cos I like my own pace and helping others out and being helped myself (which never happenes unless its a lecturer). So yeah. I've been quite worried lately, got viva's and exams and teaching lessons and papers to do. I feel really up to the mark on say 3 papers but a few others I was like "How do I start this?!!" So anyway, I had a really good evening. Been studying in the Comerce building since 8pm with a mate (luckily I still remember my Uni log in aye?). Had a decent break in between with some good ol starbucks (double shot vanilla latte anyone?). Its 2am and I'm still hypo and geared up for study ALLLL NIGHT LOOOONG!! But I gonna go home after this. Gotta do a night shift tonight at work (may need another expresso shot for that..) And Ive gotten so much work done!!
Nearly halfway on my Design paper!
Beat that suckers!...

Ohhhh I love coffee..

Peace out A Town!

PS On Monday, I'll review this entry. If its too hypo for you James I'll take it off til I've finished the paper.Ok?

I deserve a DB right now...

Task 8: Assisstive Technology

2008-06-05T21:59:00.000-07:00

Provide a definition of assistive technology
Assistive technology refers to a broad range of devices, services, strategies and practices that are conceived and applied to ameliorate the problems faced by people with disabilities.

Cook, A.M., & Hussey, S.M. (2000). Assistive technologies: principles and practice. USA: Mosby.

Describe one piece of equipment introduced to he assistive technology tutorial. Provide information on size, cost and functions.
Clicker5 (AusNZ Version) by Crick software www.spectronics.co.nz

Cost: $347.63

Clicker is a computor based writng support and multimedia tool that enables children to write (type) words phrases and pictures.

http://www.spectronics.co.nz/images/product/clicker5.jpg

At the top of the screen is a word processor where the words/phrases and pictures can go.
Underneath is the 'clicker grid' where the various words etc are held in cells which the student can click on which gets send to the word processor where it becomes a sentance. And letter keys arent even used on the computor just the mouse.
If highlighted or clicked the sentence or words etc can be said out loud in a british accent (BBC English?)
As you write the the voice can say what your are writing and highlights the words so you can read along in your head.
Changing words in the cells is easy, you just need to hold down the shift key and click on the word you want to change.
You can use your own pictures as well as the pictures from the big library that clicker offers.
You can add extra resouces such as switch equipment which is compatible with this programme as well as extra programmes such as Clicker Animations CD which lets you turn the pictures into animation.
Owning Clicker 5 gives you instant access to the hundreds of free grids on the Crick website which you can download at www.LearningGrids.com/anz
Clicker can also contain voice recordings in which a student can use their own voice to narrate a story they made.
You can make powerpoints from the grids.
Clicker 5 supports MP3 players and MPEG videos.
You can use Clicker 5 as a labeling activity
http://www.spectronics.co.nz/images/product/cricks/sgImage13b.jpg
Finally, other spectronics programmes can be used on the clicker software such as: "Find out & Write about" (factual info), "Oxford Reading Series for Clicker", "Trackers for Clicker" & "Clicker Books."

How does your chosen piece of equipment increased functional capacity for the user?

Clicker 5 can be used with students aged 5-18 years old with a broad abilities spectrum. Clicker so so adaptable that any school curriculum can be sucessfully met while accomodating for various slearning levels.

Children are able to learn at their own pace and easily make goals based on their current level.

The speech feedback allows children to self correct their own mistakes, compared to seeing mistakes in their written work which so often goes un noticed by the student, thus it will improve with their grammar and sentence construction.
Liz Briggs, a teacher at Hillshott Infant School and Nursery, Letchworth Garden City Hertfordshire, England stated on the website that because students are encouraged to self correct on the Clicker 5 programe "I can see a real improvement in their written work too – they are not afraid to try words, then check and change them if they need to! It is a fantastic motivational tool that no child can fail with. There are no negatives – the children are actively encouraged to try before they write, to discuss and make changes. Their enthusiasm for Clicker is amazing; they don’t want to go out to play! "
Clicker also enables students for example with dyslexia to remember the correct spelling of words that they have corrected themselves. The feedback speech also can drastically improve a students confidence, Kim Conner a primary school teacher from London stated on her website testimony that
"When a pupil has produced a sentence accurately a number of times (four/five) they then devise a new sentence using two or more fresh target words. These target words come from the pupil’s classroom work, for example, common spelling mistakes they make in their free writing. This way Clicker Club helps to link up the child’s learning and encourages him or her to employ the skills gained from working with Clicker in other situations within the classroom or at home. "The pupils can see their skills
developing before their very eyes!"Teachers are reporting back that Clicker Club members are making great progress in their confidence to have a go, their knowledge of strategies to learn spellings and their awareness of how to go about editing their own written work. The pupils can see their skills developing before their very eyes! They can identify why a particular word was difficult for them in the past and why it is easy for them to remember now."

Retrieved on 05/06/08 from http://www.cricksoft.com/uk/products/clicker/case%5Fstudies/connor.htm

Task 7: How to put YouTube videos and Flickr badges on your blog

2008-06-05T21:25:00.000-07:00

A requirement for following the second set of instructions is to have an account with Flickr. If you dont have one, you need register for an account first

YouTube - Blog (Myspace, Xanga, Facebook etc).

Log into YouTube under your account and search the video you want (you may want to watch it to make sure its got what you want).
Also, log onto the preferred blog of your choice.
To post the video onto your blog, look for the URL code on the right hand side of the video and copy the code you see there.
Go onto your blog and click on New Post (or equivalent) and paste the code in. To make it tidy put one space for before and after the code.
Save then publish your new post and check it out on your blog!

Flickr

Log into Flickr. Log into your chosen blog.
After youve logged into your flickr account scroll to the bottom of the page and find Tools (in tiny letters) along the subheading Help and click on it.
Scroll down a bit and on your right is a module saying: "Display Flickr photos or video on your website." Click on Build a Badge.
Follow those instructions givin to you.
On your blog page click on customise (top right corner).
Click on add elements.
Click on add script.
Paste in the URL from Flickr in the box provided.
If you want, name the badge.
Save then click publish.
(Make sure the go back to your blog by pressing only the View Blog next to the Layout button at the top or else you'll keep getting new pages.)

Task 6: Online Communities

2008-06-05T18:03:00.000-07:00

www.bookcrossing.com

What is the brief or focus of this community
Where people around the world share books by reading and traveling with said books then leaving them at specific locations for others to find them.

What services are provided? How interactive is this site? How can people contribute?
Books are bought (or just taken from their home bookshelf) and are sent traveling for others to find them. Members can capture and release books, and add to the 'travel log' of that book at the website. Members can also advertise their businesses with the website, join forums about anything (main topic being books). Members can also get together quite often at conventions to swap, talk and meet new people!

Consider material presented during the lecture and make comment on why people choose to contribute to this community. What is it they are seeking?
The websites purpose is "to make the whole world a library." I think people in general love the romantic idea of finding a book in a random place and thoroughly enjoying it and passing it on so others can have the same enjoyment. They encouraged books to be used, not to just "staying on bookshelves collecting dust." They also put across the idea that a book is something that is universally treasured whether we believe it or not, and the idea of just chucking a book when we find one is absurd because we all instinctively look through the covers to see if its interesting. If not we put it back.

Cut and paste an example of the type of topics being discussed (you may have to provide a context to your excerpt).

Posted by hennagoddess (106/52) 3 wks ago (5/13/2008 5:45:57 PM BX time)

Travel memoir recommendations

I'm looking for recommendations for travel memoirs, but not your everyday travel memoirs- - I'm looking for interesting adventures in exotic places, the sort of things that sren't written about that often. What have you read that you really liked? Check out my Travel Bookshelf on Goodreads to see what I've already read or am planning to read: http://www.goodreads.com/---/942833?...

reply | reply with quote

Re: Travel memoir recommendations

Heya
Last Christmas I bought my mum a second hand book called (The)Silk Riders. Similar to that book about Ewan McGregor and his mate going across africa but this one is about 6 New Zealanders traveling by motorbike across the original Silk Road that Marco Polo went on. Goes from Venice-Turkey-Syria-Kurkmenistan-Iran-Uzbekastan-Mongolia-China. The book was so popular at Christmas that the whole family squabbled over who was going to borrow when lol. Hope you add it too your list
Cheers
Melody

Considering material presented during the course and make comment on the potential ethical issues that may arise in this community e.g. lack of identity and accountability.
One thing that really got to me what that I thought how easy it would be to nick or throw away a book. Seems to heavily rely on an honesty system. Another thing that is personal to me is that even though I am a student I already have a much loved collection of books that I consistently re read. As a member, I would love to capture and re release any books I found, but I wouldnt want to do that to my own books. I heard of a Finnish BookCrosser (BC), who hung theirs up in a tree!!
To me thats book blasphemy! Anyone who would be intending to leave their book somewhere, I would highly recommend that they put some clear duracell or some kind of protective covering on the book as you'll never know what conditions the poor books would have to contend with until they got picked up again. One thing I'd also like to note is that in their purpose, it shows that their trying to promote literacy around the world. I think their focus is on Western cultures as there are hundreds of thousands members in the US compared to one member in Ghana.

Consider material presented during the lecture and make comment on the benefits this community holds over traditional notions of community e.g. communities reliant on geographic proximity
In spite of what I said before I think this website is brilliant because a person may come across a brilliant book in Australia from an author that was maybe more publicised in say Portugal. They really are doing their own motto of making the world a library and making literacy accessible to anyone.

Consider material presented during the lecture and make comment what this community lacks or can not provide which traditional communities can.
I can't think of anything in particular from looking on their site. I noticed they place a big emphasis of BC Conventions. Which negates the question afore mentioned because the organisors have considered the importance of meeting up frequently and to make new world wide friendships by the means of booksharing

Task 4 & 5

2008-05-27T15:03:00.000-07:00

Provide a brief summary of the services offered by U Tube. Information can be drawn from the week five tutorial hand out.

YouTube is a video sharing website where users can upload, view and share video clips. YouTube was created in mid-February 2005 by three former PayPal employees. The San Bruno-based service uses Adobe Flash technology to display a wide variety of user-generated video content, including movie clips, TV clips and music videos, as well as amateur content such as video blogging and short original videos. Unregistered users can watch most videos on the site, while registered users are permitted to upload an unlimited number of videos. Some videos are available only to users of age 18 or older (e.g. videos containing potentially offensive content). The uploading of videos containing pornography, nudity, defamation, harassment, commercial advertisements and material encouraging criminal conduct is prohibited. Related videos, determined by title and tags, appear onscreen to the right of a given video.
Retrieved May 20, 2008, from: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/YouTube

Provide a brief account (1-2 paragraphs) on how the use of planning (story boarding and scripting aided your groups short film).

Well our group was only given 2 hours to plan a story board, film and edit a 30 second clip.
The clip was on "Life as an OT Student in Dunedin."
The story board was important as the start off as it gave us a visual copy of all the scenes we wanted in our clip. Editing the story board was the first phase because we all had big expectations but then realised how short 30 seconds is. So when ended up with a few selected pictures based on the campus environment.
Then we went out and filmed about 5 minutes worth of material as we reasoned its easier to edit a lot of material than have too little choices and have to go back out to film.

Then back at the OT School we processed all our material onto an IMac that had a movie editing programme, edited all our material to 30 seconds, added music to the clip and then saved it to be loaded onto youtube.

The video we produced is below...

Task 3: Blog Creation

2008-05-25T13:11:00.000-07:00

Provide a brief summary of the services offered by Blogger.

Its pretty much like an online journal where you write what you want (so long as its not abusive). and you can also add modules (subgroups) for photos and videos. It is really easy to set up and is free.

From my perspective I think blogger would appeal more to the older generation or those who just want to keep things simple. Although you can add other persons web pages link to the blogger, there is far less emphasis on meet groups like singles, star wars fans, tramping enthusiasts etc.

Task 2: Digital Camera use and applications

2008-05-24T19:56:00.000-07:00

You know whats grinding my gears?!!!

I typed this whole thing out an hour ago then norton decided to damn well hotboot my laptop for updates and now I've had to type it out all over again!! So excuse me is this version is more abrupt than before. Dirka dirka dir!!!

“A new technology is rarely superior to an old one in every feature”. Briefly discuss this statement in relation to digital camera technology. What would you consider to be some of the pluses and minuses digital camera technology holds in relation to more traditional film based cameras?

The pros of using a digital is that if you make a mistake (thumb over lens etc) you can see it on the camera screen and delete then correct it.
It is expensive to pay for film rolls from an old film camera (some of them are mostly likely tampered anyway). $20 for a roll at the pharmacy compared to 3c a digital photo at Harvey Norman.
You save money on a digital because you can download photos plus videos the computor in order to make more space on a memory chip in the digital.
Digital imaging may encourage us to gloat over pictures on our personal websites but doesnt encourage keeping old photos in shoeboxes or albums at home where they are easier to access and enjoy.

List some of the ways that digital images can be stored transferred and manipulated using other communications technology.

Computor/adaptive cords/television/memory sticks/Photo programmes.
Videos and photos can be shown on both the computor and television as a slide show etc using the appropriate transferring cords. Photos can also be manipulated on computor using programmes where you can airbrush photos to add or take away things in the image.

Given the prevalence of image capturing devices, and thinking about the issues discussed in tutorial one, consider what sort of ethical issues may arise with their use.

Trustworthiness of other users. Especially of programmes like flickr. In my opinion it think using a 'honesty box' policy on a worldwide pictures website is a bit worrying. Anyone can manipulate any photo pretty much.

Briefly discuss some of the ways that digital images could, or are, being used in occupational therapy practice.

In my first placement at Mt Roskill Primary School I used a digital camera for my project where I made a pictorial set of instructions for a 8 year old boy with autism. The majority of it was pictures of how to set up a laptop with red arrows with 2-3 worded instructions.

In my second placement at Tauranga Hospital I found in one patients old notes pages of photos of their house (after the intial interview) which heavily affected my intervention plan with them. I also saw that taking pictures of a clients house was popular and easy use of evidence to use for getting Enable funding.

Provide a brief summary of the services offered by Flickr.com

Flickr.com is a free website that allows its members to save, host and share photos as an online album community. It was created in 2004 by a company called Ludicorp and now holds over 2 billion photos from around the world.

Name one other photo storage website which offers a service similar to Flickr.com

I can only think of Itunes (but that is a software programme assisted by its online counterpart which sells songs, videos and pictures).
If you own an ipod (one with a screen) you can transfer this data imaging from the computor to the ipod.

Explain what the difference is between a digital and an optical zoom

Optical Zoom literally zooms in.
Digital Zoom crops the image smaller.

Explain what is meant by the term mega pixel

Is what makes up all the tiny TINY squares in a digital photo (stare into your screen and look for them!).

2008-05-20T16:55:00.000-07:00

Heres a cool link I got from another student OT's blog for T shirt designs

http://www.cafepress.com/buy/occupational+therapy/-/go_1

A VERY short video on being an OT student in Dunedin

2008-05-20T16:15:00.000-07:00

2008-03-11T19:46:00.000-07:00

And one more thing...

James, please don't change my modules, I like them the way they are. That includes my photo,
Cheers!

Task One: Information Technology and Ethical Issues.

2008-03-11T19:15:00.000-07:00

Provide a definition of Information Technology/Information Communications Technology (APA reference required)

Information Technology: noun the use of computers, telecomunications, etc in electronic processing, storing, retreiving, and sending information

Allen, R. (consultant editor). (2004). The penguin english dictionary. London: Penguin Book

Consider the definition of IT you have provided. How is this form of technology spread in our society? How common has it become?

Computors have become widespread because of all the things they can allow you to do. In the early 90s computers became incredibly popular in the western home and office because it allowed for simple games (2D), word processing, and spreadsheet data gathering. Plus enabling you to save large quantities of these documents ina saved hard drive.

Now,

“... computing has changed everything, where and how we work, where and how we learn. Shop, eat, vote, make war, make love, make friends, receive medical care, spend free time...”

Bynum, T.W. & Rogerson, S. (2004). Computer ethics and professional responsibility. Oxford Blackwell Publishing.pdf

I think it has become widespread not just by the whole package of a computer but by the fact that a person can do all of that (above) just by sitting in a chair and typing something into a search engine. Some call it lazy, others call it time efficient and worthwhile.

What IT devices or system do you feel comfortable and competent using?

I like using Microsoft XP. The office programs are easy to use because I’ve unconsciously taught myself how to use it since Office ’97 came out. I am now also very familiar with windows media player and itunes because it can burn my own cds into my computer which can then easily be sent to my ipod. Also memory sticks. I think they’re the best littlest piece of technology. Love them.

Thinking about your own fieldwork experiences consider how IT is being used in Occupational Therapy practice?

In terms of my first placement where I went to a primary school, things such as touch and talk buttons, adapted computers, normal computers and laptops were all used by children with special needs. Laptops were given to all staff and were used for typing IEPS, lesson plans, itineraries and experimentation in graphics from digital cameras

What ethical implications arise from the capturing, sharing and transferring of information via IT devices (e.g. mobile phones) or systems (e.g. internet)

Users on the net can use anonymity to ensure privacy when going on websites of a sensitive nature eg abortion or mental illness. With the increasing demand, computers now have software to make computers ”user friendly” by which making them susceptible to a second person now being able to easily track that same movement by that person (Bynum & Rogerson, 2004).

Provide a definition of Computer Ethics (APA reference required)

Computer ethics is a branch of practical philosophy which deals with how computing professionals should make decisions regarding professional and social conduct.

Retrieved on 12.03.08 from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Computer_ethics

Provide a definition of Intellectual Property (APA reference required)

In law, intellectual property (IP) is an umbrella term for various legal entitlements which attach to certain types of information, ideas, or other intangibles in their expressed form. The holder of this legal entitlement is generally entitled to exercise various exclusive rights in relation to the subject matter of the IP. The term intellectual property reflects the idea that this subject matter is the product of the mind or the intellect, and that IP rights may be protected at law in the same way as any other form of property. However, the use of the term and the concepts it is said to embody are the subject of some controversy

Retrieved on 12.03.08 from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Intellectual_property

Provide a definition of Social Justice (APA reference required)

Social justice mostly refers to an ideal of society, where "justice" refers to economic status rather than to the administration of laws. It is based on the idea of a society which gives individuals and groups fair treatment and a just share of the benefits of society, although what is "fair treatment" and a "just share" must remain unclear or subject to interpretation.

Retrieved on 12.03.08 from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Social_justice

Provide a definition of Informed Consent (APA reference required)

Informed consent is a legal condition whereby a person can be said to have given consent based upon an appreciation and understanding of the facts and implications of an action.

Retrieved on 12.03.08 from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Informed_consent

In your own words briefly summarise why (or why not) a great understanding of ITC and the ethical issues it encompasses will help us in our practice and daily lives.

I think as students, we use it already when we look online at useful articles. The controlled requirements needed to have a peer reviewed article makes what we read reliable and less likely to be professionally unethical. In our daily lives, having a great understanding of ITC is probably a bit unrealistic to be honest. I mean who in the generation y group for example will actively do that everytime we typed something into a computor? Thats probably why some adolescents are targeted by cyber stalkers cos they havent considered the dangers of not actively seeking privacy and anonymity eg such as NOT supplying your phone number on bebo...
So if adolescents did that, internet chatrooms and personal websites could be a more safer setting to peruse.

Ethics and Information Technology

2008-03-09T18:40:00.000-07:00

I am very glad I decided to revise the assessment outline yesterday...
Making our posts based on tutorials - that little snippet of detail must have been mentioned in the first week where I hardly heard a thing people said cos of information overload (and I don't think I was the only one)...
I always believe that whatever doesnt kill us must make us stronger ie. me failing an easy paper cos I didnt read the assessment properly.. My my, haven't I learnt well...

R2D2

2008-02-26T14:17:00.000-08:00

Haha, I am so like that with all my electronics..

2008-02-26T14:14:00.001-08:00

2008-02-25T15:36:00.000-08:00

Hurroo Hans!!

Yay, I finally found a computor that allows me to make this blog!!
This will be fun I think, and I'm looking forward to ranting and perusing with other student OTs from around the world muwahahaha...

And until I come up with something better to say next time, so long amigo's.